Work worries as single parent of ASD teen

[Digdeep73]

Advice or perspective needed from anyone in a similar boat! I'm a single parent of two teen boys (13 and 14) - my youngest has a diagnosis of autism and attends a specialist school. He travels to school by local authority taxi, and leaves the house before 8am for a journey of around 45 mins to school.

My eldest attends a mainstream secondary in our town and takes the bus independently.

I'm sure - as anyone with a child with autism knows - it is incredibly hard combining work and being a parent carer. I do this pretty much entirely alone and it's me dealing with the sick days, school holidays, horrendous mornings, all school communication about meltdowns, collecting early if really necessary etc.

I want - and need financially - to work, but for the last six years of doing this alone I feel that I've just about been scraping by in part-time administration jobs - thanks to the goodwill of managers (which let's be honest wears thin). Financially, with 21 hrs per week income and universal credit, DLA etc. we are doing ok and coping - I'm lucky to even save a small amount of money each month if I'm careful.

In a few months my current work contract will end, and I'm in knots trying to figure out whether to apply for fully work-from-home admin jobs so that I have the flexibility to juggle the demands of single parenting (and especially the extra demands a young teen with ASC brings).

I'm not sure if I can handle being at home all the time and having no social contact of an office. Equally I absolutely hate the pressure and guilt of regularly having to pick up a sick child from school - or a child who cannot recover from a meltdown. I cannot juggle the endless holidays, as the youngest son really can't go to groups or clubs/ doesn't really have friends to hang out with/ isn't at any point of growing independence yet.

It seems like a no-brainer to go for fully work-from-home jobs, but how do others cope? Anyone else in this situation?

Thanks for reading :)

I'm not in exactly your situation (so take this for what it's worth!). I do have a partner, but do the vast majority of the care, and my only DS is still in nursery. But I do work from home and I have to say I am impressed that you are able to juggle everything you do and still go into an office! Even with working from home, with flexible hours, I used up my annual leave for the year on sick days, appointments, etc before September - in an office, having to work 9-5, I'd be toast!

Every employer is different but mine (a national charity) has embraced remote and flexible working and it can work really well. Socialising is mainly online but there's nothing stopping you from organising after work drinks, etc with those who live locally. I'm not sure what your skill set/sector experience is, but for flexibility for working parents I'd really recommend looking at third sector organisations who often have vacancies for a wide range of administrative roles. The work can be hugely rewarding so it's easy to stay motivated, and I've made genuine friends in all the third sector jobs I've had over the years.

Thank you so much, @Scratchybaby for taking the time to reply! I'd noticed lots of interesting part-time roles in not-for-profits and had a gut feeling that this sector is where I should be applying to.

I've spent too long working for universities... I think you've just confirmed that it's time for a change!

(My days of running like a hampster on a wheel from the school gates to the office ended after primary school, thankfully... that only leaves the endless school holidays, sick days, appointments, and emergencies to deal with 😂)

Really appreciated your insights into working for the third sector, and for ways to make fully working-from-home more sociable too. Food for thought over the weekend - thanks again!