My son is struggling and I'm lost

[Wendykustom]

Sorry its a long one. My son has been diagnosed with SPLD - dyslexia. He also displays several sensory processing issues and ADHD symptoms. He goes to a private school paid for by his paternal grandmother. They have a couple of teachers who are very supportive but most of them are oblivious, one is a bully.

My son is over sensitive but they seem to see that as a fault that can be corrected. I'm damned if I know how.

He's completely disengaged from PE and music and refuses to participate. I only found this out in his end of year report mind you, it wasn't reported as it happened nor was he disciplined for it.

He has a school trip in September, 3 nights. He really doesn't want to go as he remembers being homesick last time he went on one, about 18 months ago. I've tried to explain that he's more mature now and has better friends but he's cried himself to sleep about it.

His educational psychologist report diagnosed only the dyslexia (he reads well but struggles with writing).

I'm now at a loss on how to help him. He's happy at home but desperately unhappy with many aspects of school.

Thanks for any advice x

Many independent schools aren’t accommodating of SEN. Have you thought about a move &/or applying for an EHCNA?

Sorry whats an EHCNA?

It’s an education, health and care needs assessment. The assessment prior to the LA deciding whether they will issue an EHCP or not.

I don't know what that is either, sorry!

An EHCP is a legal document in England that sets out a child’s needs and the provision they require to meet those needs. In Scotland it’s called a CSP, in Wales an IDP and NI a statement of SEN.

IPSEA and SOSSEN are charities that have lots of helpful information on their websites, they have advice lines too.

And how would I get one of those? As you can tell I know NOTHING about all this and all the initials mean nothing to me I'm afraid. We have an educational psychologist report and have extracted what we think he needs from that. Would this other thing be seen as relevant in a private school?

And yes, I've thought about changing schools but to what/where I don't know. His current school has great facilities but sometimes I think its just overwhelming him.

You apply to the LA for an EHCNA. If you look on IPSEA and SOSSEN’s websites they explain a lot more about them and how to apply, they even have model letters you can use.

Pupils in independent schools can get an EHCP.

Too many initials. Sorry but this is frying my brain. I need plain English. I know you're trying to help but it isn't unless I know what there initials stand for.

@Wendykustom

LA = your local authority, your County Council.

EHCNA = Education, Health and Care Needs Assessment

What it is an EHCNA and how to get one, read this
www.ipsea.org.uk/asking-for-an-ehc-needs-assessment

More help available here
sossen.org.uk/getting_started.php

If you read LargeLegoHaul's posts again, she has already explained all that and also said "IPSEA and SOSSEN are charities that have lots of helpful information on their websites, they have advice lines too."

Also I'd advise you read up on dyslexia and its co-morbid conditions, (co-occurring-differences) This is a good starting point.
www.bdadyslexia.org.uk/dyslexia/neurodiversity-and-co-occurring-differences
Many neurodiverse conditions do not exist alone, you may find further assessments will help to identify your son's needs so you can get him the best education tailored to suit his needs.

Lastly, if you don't understand a term or abbreviation, use Google. When discussing neurodiverse conditions, many abbreviations are used and are well-known.

Maybe you are comfortable talking in acronyms but I'm not. I had already explained that. I'll seek advice elsewhere.

And they are not as well known as you seem to think. You've taken someone who was already lost and made it worse. 😔

I do appreciate the definitions but still had to google what the P was in EHCP. I'll follow the links but please lets talk plain English for an obvious newcomer especially when they've said they don't understand the initials. Throwing more initials at me isn't kind or helpful. Neither is suggesting I use google. I shouldn't have to translate. I'm already in tears at the end of my tether and completely exhausted.

I sympathize with @Wendykustom .I'm new to this system also coming from the states and literally nothing could be more confusing. When I read through these threads, and I've read a ton and been reading them for months, it's like reading a foreign language. So many acronyms and so much bureaucratic red tape. When I'm reading my head is often spinning. Like what is the difference between an EHCNA and a ECHP. I know now, but for a while i was like huh???? not mention all the other ones NHS, CAHMS, IPSEA, LA, LO, MS, SS, etc etc etc etc etc.

That said @Wendykustom while i know this is frustrating, confusing and heartbreaking remember everyone that's responded is only trying to help. It's hard because they are very familiar with this system so they speak the language fluently.

Hope is some way this post helps everyone.

I think you are now being quite rude to posters who are trying to help you, especially as your own OP included 3 acronyms. The acronyms are commonly used in schools and SEN. None of the ones I used are out of the ordinary or not “plain English”. Politely asking what they mean is one thing, but your recent posts are rather rude.

I had explained what an EHCNA was and that IPSEA and SOSSEN are charities who explain more about EHCPs and how to apply on their websites. You didn’t need to know what IPSEA and SOSSEN stand for in order to google the charities and look at the information on their websites, if you were interested in what the letters stand for their websites tell you.

I struggle to believe anyone who claims to have a school aged child in the English system but doesn’t know what LA stands for.

Hi @krobhix20 Good post :-) I know it's hard to believe, but for every parent and it's usually the mother in the UK who is trying to find out anything about the SN (Special Needs) or AN (Additional Needs, it's a newer name for SN) systems, we all have to learn the new language of the acronyms for the names of diagnoses, the tests they use to define those and the staff aand organisations involved. Before any of us even wondered if our child could be ND (NeuroDiverse) all of the terminology was unknown to all of us.

@Wendykustom

Plese see my reply above to krobhix20

Nobody is "throwing initials at you" It's how the system works. To be able to navigate the system and communicaate well within it, you need to learn the acronyms and what they stand for, exactly as every parent of a neurodiverse child has to, in order to help their child.

My son has been diagnosed with SPLD - dyslexia. He also displays several sensory processing issues and ADHD symptoms.

If he is displaying traits of other conditions, then he needs to be assessed for those by the professionals that can diagnose them and any others he may have, so that the professionals concerned in the assessment can pinpoint all of the things he struggles with and suggst interventions that will help him educationally and in his daily life. One professional cannot diagnose many conditions, hence the team approach.

You need to ask for a multi disciplinary team to assess your son. The team usually comprises Paed (Paediatrician) Ed Psych (Educational Psychologist) SALT (Speech and Language Therapist) and OT (Occupational Therapist)

You can ask your GP (medical doctor known as a General Practitioner) for a referral, either on the NHS (National Health Service) which is the UK's United Kingdom's, this country's) medical system. You can also ask the GP to recommend a private multi disciplinary team. Often the teams are the same, which makes it easier for other organisations to accept their assessments, the only difference is you pay to be seen earlier, their diagnostic systems and scoring are identical.

You also need to contact your son's school, in particular the SENCO (Special Educational Needs Co-ordinator) who may be one of the teachers or a full time member of staff in that role. SENCO should be able to advise on what interventions, help and accommodations the school are prepared to put into place for him.

Some private and state schools are absolutely dire when dealing with SN/SEN/AN (Special Needs, Special Educational Needs, Additional Needs)
because they use a 'one size fits all' approach to education and don't want to accommodate anyone who learns differently.

Some private schools belong to the organisation CReSTeD (Council for the Registration of Schools Teaching Dyslexic Pupils) which has a list of all private schools who specialise in teaching pupils with dyslexia.
crested.org.uk/
"Accrediting Schools and Teaching Centres for their Learning Support Provision.
We maintain a register of schools and teaching centres which meet our criteria for the teaching of pupils with Specific Learning Difficulties.
All schools and centres included in the Register are visited regularly to ensure they continue to meet the criteria set by CReSTeD.
We act as a source of names for educational establishments which parents can use as their first step towards making a placement decision which will be critical to their child’s educational future."

They may be able to help you select a school which can meet his needs much better than his current one, particularly if you have gone through the multi disciplinary team assessments and know his strengths and weaknesses.