Feel like I'm being constantly judged
Minsnug · 01/05/2022 23:52
I just feel my parenting is being constantly judged. Ds has a lot of behavioural issues and I'm really trying my best. His school can not even manage him. My friend/social group is nearly non existent now because nobody wants ds near them or their children. I fully understand this but it's a very bitter pill to swallow. And off course I feel fully responsible. He's my child and everybody is fed up of his behaviour. I'm his mum and I'm totally fed up too but it's not like I can turn my back or walk away. Because everyone else that tried to manage him and failed, they feel it must be my fault.
Sorry just a lonely Sunday night rant before I have to get up and do it all over again. 😒
Needanewadventure2021 · 02/05/2022 23:40
My DS doesn't exactly have bad behaviour as such however he has alot of other struggles that can trigger his behaviour in other ways. Im so glad he isnt agressive but i am worried that that will come, as ive noticed his anger is now really bad at home. He is very dominant and selfish with his friends which actually breaks my heart as he is the most loving and caring little boy. He is just very rigid in his actions and he has to follow things a certain way or he can't cope. I know children at school have told him he is bossy which he really does not like. But he is, extremely. And i worry if others blame me for it. I worry how he must come across to his friends, their families and others. 'Luckily' it hasn't become a problem yet but I'm constantly having to justify why he has reacted a certain way. His meltdowns are extreme, like people are shocked. So am I to be honest. He can be very sharp but thats usually to me and when his on one his attitude is bad. I do worry his friends will pull away from him as do children really understand special needs? I've noticed he has taken a step back from his friends as he finds when all so annoying. It upsets me how he comes across at times as if i was another parent I'd probably tell my children to stay away if he can't be nice let others have a say.
I find I'm being judged mostly by my parents. They finally accept something is wrong however they still don't get it. Apparently he walks all over me, he has no discipline, he needs to start following rules and doing as his told. I find their constant comments hard as he has those things, rules and discipline, I cant help the fact he gets scared when I'm out of sight, is scared to leave the house, doesn't have a set bedtime because he won't stop getting out until I go to bed with him. I dont believe in screaming at my child. That will be triggering for him and it would not work. We talk things through, repeatedly with me keeping calm but being firm. But I can understand why my parents think like they do as he still continues they way he is no matter how many times I try to correct him.
Sorry if not exactly the same but I want you to know you arent alone. Its hard. I dont have a clue alot of the time and as horrible as I feel admitting it, I too find my son difficult. Maybe for different reasons but he can be hard work. It's draining. E are in a new routine at the moment due to a job change. Its not goinf easy at all. These last few weeks have been tough.
It's just me and him at home and understanding he is different to his peers I guess I am more protective over him but I also see it from an outside point of view.
Chin up there are better days
HSHorror · 04/05/2022 10:52
I feel the same. My dc has just been excluded from an activity and so im mixed between angry at dc and the leader. Who even said they wouldnt deal with sen dc!!
Dc actually wasnt being too bad just not joining in.
And worst of all dc obviously needs more social interaction and now they have even less.
We also have issues with judgement from other parents.
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