Hi to MNs with older DCs being diagnosed with autism

[allthatglisters]

Hi, Spoke to some of you before about getting a late diagnosis for autism (DS now 11). Was nice to know others going through similar. Update is that we saw the sch. paediatrician with result that DS is 'definately on the autistic spectrum', and has got appointments coming up for a speech and language assessment, and a more in depth autism assessment.

Happy new year to you all.

Happy New Year to you too.

I remember your thread back in the summer.

Glad you are getting something done at last. I hope you are feeling OK with it all. How is your DS? I hope he is coping well too.

Hi again Niecie

Well I was glad to get confirmation - in fact paediatrician said it was fairly obvious. DS still doesn't know as I sort of implied the appt was to do with his speech (he's had speech therapy in the past) - so he's his normal self. School got a copy of the result so that should be useful.

How are things going with you?

DS is OK thanks for asking. He started Juniors in September and I am not sure that his new teacher is right for him this year - she doesn't seem to have worked out what he is and isn't good at. She reckons he can do some of his timetables, we don't. She doesn't rate his reading as highly as she should and we (and his old teacher) think he is doing very well with it.

The infants didn't pass on his DX (or the juniors didn't notice it, not sure which) and there were no copies of his reports given to the junior school which is annoying. This ended up with the SENCO wondering if he should go and see a psychiatrist (a psychiatrist???) but only after we went to discuss what they were going to do for him. I think they would just have put him down as a bit lazy and not capable of paying attention in class which is a bit sad.

We saw the OT a couple of months ago for the first time in 2 years and so we are concentrating on his handwriting. We also saw the SALT right at the end of the summer term so he is still having a bit of speech therapy although they intend to sign him off. He is doing OK but they don't seem keen to refer him to the ed psych for ideas about what to do about the social communications stuff to help him fit in a bit more. They seem to think they can handle that as they have a programme they do with other children. I'm not so sure but we will see.

He is loving school though and seems happy enough so I can't complain really. That is half the battle isn't.

One thing I have learnt though is that I have to be so on the ball all the time to make sure that he gets the help he needs when it is due. Difficult if you don't know the system works.

Does you DS have appointments soon or are they a big wait. How long is it since the ball started rolling on this?

In some ways it is good that it takes a while as by the time you get the dx you are pretty resigned to it and it isn't too worrying, you just want to get on with the therapy. It would be devastating if you went to the doctors and within a couple of weeks someone gave you such a life changing dx without time to adjust to the idea.

I hope it all goes smoothly for you.

Glad your DS is enjoying Juniors. Perhaps his teacher will get to know him a bit better this term now the class has settled in.

We had a similar thing re. infants not passing on records - only recently found out that his speech therapy reports weren't in his file at juniors - explains why teachers always looked at me blankly when I used to mention his speech problems at parent evenings. Anyway it turns out that having had speech delay is quite important in getting a dx.

The ball was first started rolling about 2 years ago - it took about a year to get an ed. psych. report, then I thought about it for a while, and then I went to the GP to get a referral to the sch. paediatrician (the sch. told me to do this, when in fact they could have made the referral themselves) - the appointments the sch. paediatrician has set up (SALT and autism assessment) seem to be happening fairly quickly - have one of them this month. But you're right - it's very difficult to know how the system works, and the school may not necessarily be very clued up.

Does your DS have one of those tilted writing boards to help with his handwriting?

And yes, we are fairly resigned to the dx - though its a difficult thing as sometimes we despair about him and other times he surprises us with how well he's come on. However when I think of the things that might come up in the future and how he may not cope (ranging from fillings at the dentist to being called up for military service!) its better to have the option of a diagnosis having been made, if it's needed.

Hello allthatglisters.
I remeber your earlier posts. I hope your ds is allrightin school. Similarly to your ds,My ds is 12 and was recently dx'd, very quickly, imo, which makes me think his traits are also very obvious, and I have been in denial for years, or that they are keen to hand out dx's (which I must say seems unlikely). But I wonder How can this come about ?I have told ds and he is adjusting to it, but I know find myself wondering who else I can tell, it seems that notthing has changed, as well he is pretty happy at the mo. No, had two tantrums over homework at the weekend, which exhaust me.

Good luck with your assessments.

Hi sasquatch - I remember you as well. Isn't your DS into dancing? Have I got the right person? Glad you have got your dx sorted. Has the school done nothing for your DS? They can give help with social skills, although as I was saying earlier, it seems that it is a little difficult to get them to do this.

Homework tantrums are a pain aren't they?! I dread secondary school and the extra work that will bring - bad enough getting DS to do his 45 minutes a week and his reading. I don't think the tantrums are restricted to AS children though!

Hello again allthatglisters.

DS tried the writing board but claimed not to like it or find it useful. However, he did it at school and I don't think he tried it for very long. If I had been his teacher I think I would have made him try it for a couple of days to see if he could get used to it but it is too late now. His mind is made up. I think part of the problem is that he stands out from the other children when using it and no child likes that much, do they?

I dread the dentist for DS too. DS went when he was about 3 and has been to the school dentist but not a proper one. One of those things I need to organise but haven't yet. I haven't found a dentist I am happy with yet. I went to one about 15 months ago and he did the work I needed but he scared me and I wouldn't wish him on a child! Its on my 'to do' list!

I sympathise with the school not doing very much and the info not being passed on. I am very glad to have avoided having to get a dx via the school. If I get the chance I would tell anybody to go straight to the GP as an ed psych can't dx AS and even getting the school to refer you to one is hard work for some. However, one of those things I only know by being 'inside' the system. I didn't know that before we started all this which is part of the problem. I was just lucky to have a clued-up HV who realised what DS's problem might be and got a GP referral for us.

Ho hum, we live and learn!

Hi Sasquatch, DS is ok at doing homework because he's very routine dependent - as long as it's quick and easy! I think I'll probably be accepting a lower standard than he is perhaps capable of, as long as it is done. From my older DCs I remember them getting a lot of homework in the first year of seniors and they found it a challenge.
In my own DS's case I can see how the late dx came about - fairly normal baby, then pre-school problems put down to speech delay etc, then us giving him time to 'come on'. He didn't cause problems to his class teachers, and he's been averagely successful academically.
Niecie - yes I can see that he wouldn't like the writing board. When they get to seniors the kids can write up a lot of their work on the computer. DS has got slightly better about the dentist and has had a couple of his back teeth 'painted' recently. He used to be quite phobic about the dentist's light in his eyes. It doesn't help with things like this in that he looks a couple of years older than his age.
How should I tell the dentist of his dx - a letter?