I would have posted on the other blardy mother thread but have nothing useful to add except empathy. My issue is a different one.. my parents, although they claim to love DS, just can't be doing with him!
Ok DS is 7, complex needs, mobile on hands/knees and via launchig himself, on his own two legs, kamakazi style at things and people (he can't maintain any balance so used a wheelchair when out but won't stay in it..).. is sometimes violent and needs 24/7 supervision.. but wouldn't you think that my mum, at least, when here with the rest of us at Christmas no less, could do her little bit at helping us with him? I don't expect much.. I know can't life him (I barely can!), but I mean, just while she is there, in the same room with him while visiting. She is fit/healthy/in her sixties and can't do enough for everyone else in the entire world, it seems, but DS just pisses her off, clearly. She remains rooted to the spot while he wrecks the Christmas tree etc, even through she is closest and I have my hands full elsewhere.. and just shrieks at him!!
And then said "Ohhhh!! I don't know how you cope!" (Not with any of your help/support that's for sure!)
And my dad, who admittedly is nearly 77 and in a nursing home, said to me today (because I'd taken DS with me to visit him 2 days running - DS gets even higher maintenance if he doesn't get out of the house at least once a day).. "Don't bring him with you tomorrow will you?" He was actually really good at Dad's and only knocked a few things down because he is clumsy and uncoodinated; not because he wa doing it deliberately on this occasion! Dad himself has had a disability since birth, you'd think he'd be a little understanding wouldn't you??!
These are my parents FFS! DS's grandparents! Sometimes I SO wish I had those sort of parents who I could still lean on, just a little, occasionally, rather than having to parent them!