My blaaaaaardy mum

[staryeyed]

Well we have coped quite well with Christmas and all the excitement it brings. But my mum is doing my blaaaaardy head in. If she tells one more person that Ds can understand everything we say I am going to scream. I know she is in denial but puuuurrleeeeease. She was telling anyone who would listen that he's just like everyone else really and he playing us all for fools. Just because he knows routines does NOT mean he understands instructions. She also tells everyone that he so much smarter than other kids his age and keeps explaining his behaviours by saying "all children do that." If I hear one more time "other children his age cant do that" about something that actually most children his age have been doing for ages. My tactic so fr is to completely ignore her and not even acknowledge when she makes these ridiculous statements but ignoring doest work she keeps repeating her self like a parrot.

AAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrghhhhhhhh! Why cant my mother live in the real world were my son has autism and is developmentally delayed?!!

God how infuriating! We had this a little bit just before DS2 was diagnosed but not so much now - though MIL does keep saying to me 'I'm SURE he'll be all right. It'll just take him a little bit longer' followed by some story about a friend of a friend whose autistic son has just made a speech at his sister's wedding. She means well by it - but it is a bit head in the sand.

I know just what you mean staryeyed; my in laws are also in denial "we think he's going to be fine!" they say with superior smiles! Yes, why, do you have a cure for autism up your sleeve?! And what I find incredible is my own parents watching me and my DH run around after DS all Xmas Day and not one offer to take him for a few minutes. We have to eat in shifts, while one looks after DS - in fact we have not sat down together for Xmas lunch for 4 years. Yet no-one thinks to offer help. Yet there are always volunteers to play with our NF DD! The other one that drives me mad is when my ILs say "he just said [insert improbably complex word]" - because they have not worked out yet the difference between echoed and real speech. Am quite glad Xmas Day is over!

Oh yes, been there!
My in-laws like to say that it is the way I raise the kids, so they all start to have problems!
I usually find it very difficult when they are around, but then I like to imagine their world unravelling just a bit, and then when they turn to me for advice, I can say, 'oh that is terribly NORMAL!', but ofcourse I wouldn't do that! I would help them, and sympathise, like I always do.
Lately I have been really angry with them, especially my sil, and have really let things get to me, I have layed awake at night consumed by it all.
However, I have decided, that they are all jealous, because they know that they can't cope with my life, and I can.
DEEP BREATH!
I have had to do alot of deep-breathing these holidays, it seems worse than last year!
They don't know about my ds2 and possible apergers yet! That should send their heads into a spin

Oh, my mum told me how she read about brain plasticity so with a bit more effeort on dd's part, she could overcome her total body cerebral palsy and start doing cartwheels or somesuch.

Heeeeeeeeelllp. My mum is still driving me crazy. She keeps talking like she is an expert in children and all things autism. It is really bugging me. "2 year olds cant normally do that" "he is much more intelligent than an average 2 year old" etc. Apparently "there are many advantages to having autism" and Ds is a genius because he removed the end bit of the banana and other kids just wouldn't - The thing is she has never been around any children, not for 15 years. The only time she has is when she took him to an SN group where she insisted that he is the most clever because none of the other children could do a 4 piece peg puzzle and Ds could. How can you compare SN children? FFS

AAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrgggh!!

God it is so much easier for them to live in denial isn't it. How much longer to go with her there?? Does she at least provide a bit of useful babysitting?

Yes she does babysit aquarius but unfortunately I live with her at the moment. Its constant but its so much worse this holiday because there are so many people for her to tell.