Refusing to go school

[Shittymumm]

My four year old little boy with suspected autism has started to refuse to go to school since going back after Christmas.
When I say refuse I still take him and he still goes in but the morning is now filled with him crying/screaming and him saying he's not going and he wants to stay with me.
He usually settles down after a while once at school, unfortunately today he got his way and was sent home as soon as we got there to do a lateral flow test (was negative) due to a rash on his face.
I'm worried that he will now think he can kick off and expect to be sent home.
Am I overthinking or am I right to be worried? If so any one have any ideas on how to make mornings easier? X thank you

Try not to overthink it, but do analyse why he might be feeling this way and see how to adjust his experience to a positive one so he settles.
If its attachment to you he will get over that dont worry

He's telling you there's a problem. It might be with the transition, could be he's struggling with school itself. Might be better to try and find out what the problem is and work w the school make things better for him, than just to insist he goes in, otherwise all he is learning is to be miserable quietly .

Thank you for replying, I have spoke to his teachers and it turned out that there has been a few changes with new TAs coming in and a new routine of less playing and more focus on set tasks, so I'm going to ask for abit of information of what might be happening the next day at school so I can talk to him and prepare him for the day on the way to school. I'm not sure if its the right thing but I'll try it, any other suggestions? Always happy for the help and advice thank you again x

Does DS have an EHCP?
What support are the school providing?

Would DS be better arriving slightly earlier or later and via a different entrance so that it is quieter?
A special job or specific task DS does on entry that is the same each day may aid transition.
If part of the problem is separation anxiety can you give DS something small he can keep in his pocket to remind him of you?
At a basic level a visual timetable and now and next board may help if you think part of the issue is the change in routine.
Is DS struggle with the work/tasks?
Can DS articulate why he doesn’t want to go?

Apologies for all the questions, you don’t have to answer, just things to think about.

@Imitatingdory hi, the senco has applied for an EHCP, just waiting for it all to go through and be accepted. At school he has his "own" TA to support him, he gets breaks to go to the sensory room throughout the day when he's to overwhelmed, his own working space and his own box of little toys which he can fidget with. (Things I can remember off the top of my head)
His entrance is as quiet as it could be, its only his year and we get there early.
I'll have to try him with a little something from home, what would you suggest? Would have to be something small I suppose.
We have a now and then board, he doesn't seem to have taken to it at home as well as he has done at school but we use it anyways, to be honest it helps keep all of us on track not just my little lad 😄
He struggles with school work/tasks at school and homework but he is averaging about 1/2 years behind education wise.
And he has got basic communication, so he can tell me he doesn't want to go but doesn't/can't explain why. Thanks x

Where are you in the EHCP process? Are the LA sticking to the timescales? Have you requested all the necessary assessments?

What about going straight to the sensory room for a while in the mornings?

Common transition objects are a handkerchief of yours sprayed with your perfume, key ring, tiny teddy, little figure, a small photograph of you both together would all fit in his pocket or something slightly bigger such as a scarf of yours.

Only just been sent off so very early, he's been seen by CLASS and a Educational therapist we are still on the waiting list for SALT. The school/senco are really good and seem to be doing everything, and all the health visitors/consultants ive spoke to speak highly of the senco, but im new to all this so I could be wrong.
I'm going to speak to the school tomorrow, ask them to try it, see if that will help.
Thank you for the suggestions, going to try a small picture of us in his book bag thank you x

The LA must inform you whether they are going to assess or not within 6 weeks. Then if they are going to assess the LA must seek advice from:
a) the child’s parent or the young person;
b) educational advice (usually from the head teacher or principal);
c) medical advice and information from a health care professional;
d) psychological advice and information from an educational psychologist;
e) advice and information in relation to social care;
f) advice and information from any other person the local authority thinks appropriate;
g) where the child or young person is in or beyond year 9, advice and information in relation to provision to assist the child or young person in preparation for adulthood and independent living; and
h) advice and information from any person the child’s parent or young person reasonably requests that the local authority seek advice from.

H means you can request assessment from SALT, OT, psychiatrist, clinical psychologist etc. without the need to sit on the normal waiting lists. If the NHS can’t or won’t within the statutory timescales the LA must commission independent assessments.