EHCP and NRP issues

[ShadowsInTheDarkness]

Hi all. I'm a lurker in this section rather than a poster. My DD is 10yo and has Triple X Syndrome with associated GDD, Social comm difficulties, sensory processing difficulties, as well as a range of physical needs.

Me and the DCs dad separated when they were small due to domestic abuse. We are just in the process of applying for an EHCP for the fourth time (whole other thread!) at a crucial point with DD due to move to secondary next year. Paediatrician and specialist teaching team have recommended specialist provision rather than mainstream which we are really pleased about and I have the forms to sign today to get the process underway.

The DCs dad has always taken issue with the "real ness" of their additional needs and has recently sent me a solicitors letter which states that he is concerned they are behind at school, sees no reason for them to be behind at school and pushing for more contact to support them better. I am pushing back re contact as he doesn't support DD needs at all during contact time as it is but my concern is the EHCP. Does anyone know what would happen if he were to push for mainstream school or disagree with EHCP?

I fully intend to involve him in the process as he is currently determined to make a show of being interested (despite never previously attending a single meeting or appointment) however he has made it clear that his stance is that DD just needs to work harder and a good mainstream will push her to "catch up". I can't find any information online about what the process and procedures are if parents can't agree on EHCP or schooling for children with complex needs. Hoping someone here can give me some more information.

TIA

Sadly the SEN regs don't account for situations where parents disagree over school placement. Although there is relevant case law - SG v Denbighshire CC [2016] UKUT 460 (AAC). Ultimately SENDIST would decide.

"Paediatrician and specialist teaching team have recommended specialist provision rather than mainstream "

^^ This sounds key, to me. The Paed and spec teaching team will have documented reasons for thinking this, including presumably some assessments which "measure" your DD's delays and needs. So perhaps you could ask them to list out what their reasons and assessments are etc, then ask your ex partner to work through the list and reflect on it, ask him to write down and put forward any differences in opinion he has with the professionals and give him the chance to be heard and consider his thinking.

I would suggest you use email to invite him to comment on things (unless you're both in a meeting and someone is taking minutes) so there is a clear record if you need it later showing you have considered his opinions and thought carefully about his reasons.

Ultimately I guess I'm suggesting you treat him a bit like a professional who disagrees with you! - ie approach it politely, thoroughly, keep to the correct etiquette snd boundaries - but always bring it back to the evidence - the assessments of your child - and base your arguments on these.