Having a hard day.

[Shutupyoutart]

Does it ever get any easier? My DS has asd im finding it a real challenge atm with him he is a wonderful boy but he is constantly on the go, doesn't understand how own strength at all is constantly knocking people over throwing things climbing or jumping on me or hitting me, we got a dog because I thought would calm him but it's just made him worse he jumps on her, pulls her ears at her genitals etc she's so patient but I'm constantly chasing him away from her. He doesn't eat properly, barely sleeps I'm also having problems in my marriage so I feel a bit of a wreck atm. I just sat and sobbed and him and DD (2) just laughed at me. Please be kind I feel so fragile atm

I’m sorry you’re having a tough time. How old is your son? Has he also been assessed for ADHD?

@openupmyeagereyes thank you. He's four and a half he hasn't been assessed for ADHD but I am pretty sure he has it. I don't think they assess for it until about 6 or 7 over here

Generally they will say it’s likely they have it but will not formally diagnose until they are older. Has he started school this year?

You’re really in the trenches with a two year old as well. Do you have any family support you can lean on?

I’m really no expert but trying to wear ds out might help. Lots of outdoor time and access to a trampoline or exercise ball, things that give him movement and feedback in a more controlled way.

Thank you :) yes he is defo a sensory seeker so we have invested in a lot of sensory things he has a swing which is brilliant! Try to get him out as much as poss but it's hard on my own with the two little ones as DS is an eloper! Atm he seems to mostly be obsessed with the dog though so trying to find a balance where he can play with the dog but she gets some space too. Smallest dd is copying a lot of behaviours so I am finding it very tough. My family are great but they struggle to Cope with ds a bit too my mum is a great listener though I basically just poured my heart out on the phone to her yesterday and feel a bit better today. I would be pretty certain he has ADHD he finds it so hard to be still at all unless Infront of a screen and everything goes in one ear and out the other when you ask him to do anything.. he will be starting school next sep but I think he's going to find it very challenging to sit in a seat and concerntrate for that long, he has an sna atm at pre school.

You’ve just described my life. My boy is 6 and diagnosed Autistic, likely ADHD but on the 2 year waiting list for assessment.
He’s become violent, he won’t go to sleep at night … it’s affecting my marriage and our relationship with both our children.

I’m sat sobbing in my youngest room while my boy’s dad takes a turn at a beating.

I really feel you and hear you. I hope things improve soon for you all

Apologies in advance for all the questions.

Has DS seen an OT?
Does he take melatonin?

Have you had a carer's assessment and DS an assessment by the disabled children's team?

If DS is already receiving 1:1 at preschool and you think he will struggle in school you can apply for an EHCP yourself. IPSEA and SOSSEN are helpful charities for education advice.

Have you heard of HomeStart?

They some of the above questions are relevant to you too.

@imitatingdory he has seen ot only for an initial assessment that was over two years ago he's on a waiting list for ot. The psychologist who assessed him said in her report that he has significant sensory needs and she strongly recommended ot for DS as a priority. He's under early intervention but has so far been seen by speech therapist three times and that's it. We had a behavioural support workshop online and am begining an understanding autism one soon that they recommended. He has an sna at school but so far I have no clue about what to expect for school. I will look into the organisations you suggested but we are in roi so it might be slightly different I don't know .we also have a pa for six hours a week. I've looked up alot about sensory issues and have bought a lot of sensory equipment which sometimes helps and sometimes doesn't.

Also @imitatingdory he doesn't take any medication no

@theyveallgone I'm sorry you are struggling as well, thank you for your kind words it really helps to talk to people who understand x

OP melatonin may help DS's sleep, which in turn could make a perks of difference day to day.

I'm sorry, I don't know the equivalent in ROI, but if you start a thread someone else may.

Hi all sorry to be re posting on this thread by I couldn't for some reason start a new one. So DS who is 4 and a half has a diagnosis of asd (it's a working diagnosis) I've long suspected he has ADHD he ticks every box for it. As He is still very young so far has not been assessed for it. After speaking with the sna at his preschool I finally broached the subject and she wholeheartedly agrees he has it. (she herself has a child with ADHD) she also went on to say she doesn't think he's autistic at all! I said I don't disagree with his diagnosis of asd but that maybe due to ADHD it might be milder than originally thought, she said that she isn't seeing any signs of autism at school and listed out alot of classic symptoms of asd I said well alot of those are things that we were originally worried about that prompted the diagnosis and she said yes but they are all gone now! She said If she calls his name he will look straight away etc at home this has improved as well tho I'd say he responds 50/50 she said his eye contact is good... I find it ok as long as it's on his terms, I said about sensory issues she said he doesn't display them at school and she said often asd/ADHD can overlap. I think I'm going to try to get him reassesed has anyone any experience of this? His sna is amazing with him and he has come on so far with her but she also has form for being opinionated and making me feel minimised. I'm worried he isn't going to get the help he needs when he starts school as the head teacher there doesn't believe in ADHD 🙄 had a meeting with him the other day and some of his views on the subject shocked me. Despite him doing so well at school the last few days he hasn't wanted to go and we are still struggling with some behaviours at home too. I'm left doubting every thing again. Including now my parenting. Anyone any advice please id be so grateful 😊

The head teacher not believing in ADHD would be a massive red flag to me. The head teacher ultimately sets the ethos for the school. Is this school your only option?

Do you think your child could be masking at school? How is he when he gets home? I wonder if the not wanting to go is a sign of that?