Ex won't allow 7 year old DD an autism diagnosis

[Alicenwonderland]

Hi! I'm hoping someone here can give me some advice regarding my DD. Ex and I separated 4 years ago, it was DV and has been a mess ever since, court custody battles ect ect. I'm resident parent and he sees DD EOW and one day after school in the week. We have a family history of SEND, (half siblings) and it's been suspected for a long time my DD is on the spectrum. She has an Early Help Plan and has seen the educational psychologist twice. School and myself are keen for her to go on the pathway for a diagnosis, ex refuses. Our concerns are secondary where she may not be as well supported as primary. The wait list is 2 1/2 years where we are so in my mind it's worth going on it and see when we get there! His argument is that my elder DS gave up and didn't bother trying once he was diagnosed 🙄
Can I go ahead or will it need to go to court? Thanks in advance.

Try to go ahead as you got your child's educationalists backing.

Only if he digs his heels in take it to Court.

He is digging his heels in, school would go ahead and do the referral but in the meeting he said no. I'm debating going privately.

Do both of you need to agree for the school to do the referral? Is it possible for you to contact them and ask them to go ahead with just your permission, or does it need to be permission from both of you?

No one has ever asked DH to consent to any of DS's assessment or support plans. As it happens we're in full agreement, and I just happen to be the one who dose the correspondence with school and doctors etc. but no one has actually checked. They'll most likely go ahead without even asking, unless he takes steps to prevent it, so I'd just press on without even mentioning it.

I'm sure you can contact the SENCO for a meeting on your own without you ex being there? If the meeting is being asked for by you then he doesn't need to be present. I would set out what you have here and ask if you are able to consent on your own. He would have to take you to court to try and stop the assessment at which point the court are unlikely to agree with him as he is actively blocking something designed to help understand and support a child's needs!

I have always consented for assessments and medical treatment without seeking my ex's agreement and no one has ever questioned whether the other parent also consents. Just go ahead with it and make sure any appointments take place during your contact time. It's needed for the welfare of your child so I'd just put that at the forefront of your mind and be proactive. Good luck