Only child not wearing fancy dress.

[Sourcreamsky]

Yesterday at school was dress up day. Despite my best attempts to prepare my Autistic son all week, he got really upset yesterday morning and would only wear his uniform. Now, I know it shouldn’t matter what others think but drop off and collection really got to me. It felt like I hadn’t bothered when everyone else had made huge efforts. Why am I getting myself so upset about this when I’ve had to overcome much bigger issues in the past? He’s nearly 6 btw.

If it make you feel any better my son has worn the same outfit (blue trousers and a striped top) for the last 4 years, he's now 8. He completely refuses to wear anything else including uniform! So I empathise as I used to feel this most days when dropping him off at school.

My feeling now is that if it takes wearing these clothes for him to feel comfortable and safe it's not the most difficult adjustment to accommodate and it's not worth worrying about what other people think. Easier said than done though!

You really shouldn't worry about what people think once you know you have done your best. (Let the teachers know if you think its necessary.) We parents with SEN children have many other things to think about than to worry about other people's perceptions.

Just take your child and go. If someone asks and you want to tell them, do. If not, treat their stares as water on a duck's back!

I find things like this tough because it is a re-adjustment of things I assumed I would do with my child.

But it is brilliant that you are showing him that he can choose and if he feels strongly about not wearing a costume he doesn't have to. Hopefully it will give him confidence and make him feel supported in his choices.