Dad slapped son during visitation

[Woolwichgirl]

Am so confused.What should I do..Dad and son just started visitation a few months ago after 3 years of not seeing him due to domestic voilence incidence against me in the past.
Dad has autism and Adhd.Same with son.
Son has extreme behavioural issues that is being managed with ritalin.
They were out today and Dad said son got out of control and wont listen to him
Son hit him and he lost his temper and slapped him hard..
Its 4 hours later and the marks are still on his face and tomorow is actually my sons 7th birtthday and this is the gift he gets?
I do acknowledge my son has extreme behaviorual issues but i deal with these on a daily basis without resorting to hitting or beating my son.
Am boiling with anger.Dad has apologised but what should i do..I have told him not to come for visitation next week though.But were do we go from here?

I'm so sorry you are having to deal with this and hope your Ds is okay.

His father has assaulted him. I would stop all contact and report him to the police immediately. You need to protect your son as his dad clearly doesn't have enough self control to deal with him and has a history of violence.

There is absolutely no excuse for slapping a child. The mark on his face is awful. I know it's difficult but your son's behaviour is no excuse for him being assaulted by his father, you need to go to the police.

Thanks spikeyfish for your quick reply.
Yes you are right.This is definitely assault.
I know I should probably go to the police but av been through domestic violence and police case years ago and it was a traumatic experience for me and I dont want to go through all that again.
I think for now.I will just end visitation till i can think of what to do.
My son is not safe with him so Dad cant have him alone.
Thats for sure.

Your child has been assaulted. That must have been a really hard slap if that's the marks still there after 4 hours. Your poor son!
I would contact the police. He would not be getting him back if it were me.

You must go to the police. Otherwise how will you stop him doing it again? Yes you can, and should stop contact immediately, but what happens if he then takes you to court for access? How will you stop that?

No No.He cant take me to court for assess.In addition to this assault on my son, have a lorry load of domestic voilence attack on me by him from past years.The best he would get is a visitation center.

Meant to say I have a lorry load....

Lorry load of evidences..sorry for typo..Am not feeling very ok tonight with all these going on.

I can only imagine how difficult that was for you but you are putting yourself in difficult position if you don't report this to the police. Your son has been assaulted and if your Ds was to mention at school that this had happened they would immediately report to the police/social services which would raise why you didn't do it yourself. Does his dad have other children or access to other children, could they potentially be put in danger. You really need to give this a lot of thought and protect both your Ds and yourself.

I can only imagine how difficult that was for you but you are putting yourself in difficult position if you don't report this to the police. Your son has been assaulted and if your Ds was to mention at school that this had happened they would immediately report to the police/social services which would raise why you didn't do it yourself. Does his dad have other children or access to other children, could they potentially be put in danger. You really need to give this a lot of thought.

Report it. You owe it to your dc. How will you prevent it happening again otherwise? Were there witnesses?

Thanks for all your replies..No..I dont have got any other kids with him..I am very very angry about the whole thing.My poor little boy still has the marks on his face as I type this..But hes also crying and saying I should forgive his Dad.
Also Dad has messaged a few times this evening to apologise and inquire of sons welfare although I didnt let him speak with son.
I have told Dad that visits have to stop as this is assault and very serious..He says he understands and will let us be.

There were no witnesses but dad has admitted it on whatsapp conversation which I have screenshoted and son can recount everything as it happened.

@Woolwichgirl

No No.He cant take me to court for assess.In addition to this assault on my son, have a lorry load of domestic voilence attack on me by him from past years.The best he would get is a visitation center.

I'm afraid you're wrong on this. His abuse of you won't necessarily be a barrier to him having unsupervised access to his child. The court will decide if he's a risk to the child and go by that. Obviously you know he's a risk to your child but the court will want proof. Your word and a photo of a red face won't be enough, he'll just deny it.

Im sorry but considering he only ever sees him during visitation leads me to think he doesnt do bulk sharing of taking care of your son. So to slap him in the limited time he gets with him is very very bad. I dont know about stopping them from seeing each other but at the very least...visits must be supervised from now on.

Does he go to nursery/school? If so they may raise a safeguarding concern. Don't make your ds feel ashamed of his father's behaviour.