development of sibling of DS with ASD

[Rorlaa]

I have a 5 mo DD. Her development is even slower than his brothers. She doesn't really giggle or bubble and isn't talking back. She can't roll over and only smiles when we smile at her. She's a calm baby. If I show her a toy she holds it for a short time but doesn't seem too excited.
I am really worried.
Does somebody have an encouraging story ? Or is it time to prepare for the second slap?

@Rorlaa how is ur daughter now?

Most likely autistic too :(
She's too young too tell for sure but has a ton of red flags.

@Rorlaa is she pointing or waving or other gesture?

She does point yes but not to ask or share. She can wave if prompted, but wouldn't recognise when it's time to say goodbye on her own. No other gestures so far and she's 15 months in a few days.

@Rorlaa if she is pointing n waving than she is fine... why r u worrying?

@Rorlaa my baby is 12 months he babble very rarely but otherwise he seems fine. he points for ask,request, share. he waves, on promoting, clapping, dance, etc. he is behind in speech area. never make effective sppech like sound.

'cause autism is not a pointing/waving disorder ?? And I already have an older DS who pointed and waved and who is still autitic so for me her different way of acting has been very obvious from early on.
Your baby sounds fine for social/personal aspect, and language delay is the most common and innocent delay among toddlers so I don't think you should be thinking about autism, but maybe about some hearing issue?

@Rorlaa how is ur baby now

@Rorlaa really need your update cause my girl doing as ur girl...and DS is HFasd

@Rorlaa how is ur girl now?

@Rorlaa how is ur baby now?

@mthrofflwr @kmmxt1 Hi all I've just noticed there are new comments.
How's my DD? Firstly: yes she has asd so my intuitions were right.
There were flags since she was born: she was an IUGR baby (higher risk for development delays and asd) she actively turned her head away to avoid eye contact by 2-3 months, didn't start back and forth babbling by 6 months, didn't reach to pick up by 9 months - She just bumped her head in my leg to avoid looking up at my face. Her gross motor development was a bit slower than normal so she had PT but it resolved by 9 months.
No gestures by 12 months. First words came by 15 months: one day she spontaneously counted from 1 to 10 out of nowhere. Then there was a big leap in her development, and for a short period of time I really thought she might not be autistic.
Now she's 2, has an age appropriate vocabulary, conversational, can speak in short sentences, with some echolalia. Can't tell you how much easier it is with her now compared to my older DC who was almost completely nonverbal around this age.
However her avoidance of eye contact is very remarkable. Her play is slightly repetitive but she has great imitation skills, so she can be taugth to play.
To sum up I'd say she and us are ok now, but no, she's def not NT.
I was really worried in her early infancy that she ends up lower functioning than her brother because she had greater delays. She was born two weeks prior to the provisional DX of my older DC so it was a very emotional period and won't lie I was severly depressed for the past 2 years. I was praying and crying and praying again...
By the age of 2 she is more advanced and looks hf. So you really can't predict their trajectory.

@RRorlaa is she diagnosed???it might be developmental delay not asd,

No, she's on a waiting list atm but she was flagged after she scored 4-5 points on M-chat.
I understand why you're asking this - actually I don't like this spectrum diagnosis, bc clearly my DCs don't have classic autism but both have significant impairement in social development and communication and now it's all put in the same category and I always feel a bit ashamed bc I know our problems are much easier compared to those with classic or moderate autism.
But DD has never developed typically, and has qualitive differencies in her development, it's so evident when I'm around other kids. I really don't care about the label , let's call it pervasive development disorder, but what it really means for me that it'll always be there and will always be a rocky way of parenting.

Is there really exist development delays after 2 without underlying issues? I always heard that development delays should be resolved until 2 if there's nothing behind. But I heard so many silly things the past years...

Btw autism is the most (or almost) common neurological disorder by now so it makes it probable just by the statistics as well.

Sorry I'm a bit emotional right after the holidays.
How's your DD now?

Yeah she is 5months old giving good eye contact,engaging with us ,and no back and forth cooing but she coos at objects and people , she is not imitating facial expressions, great sleeper. What about your son is he started speaking (two words combination)