overwhelmed

[lemmeavabru]

Hi all
I posted on AIBU a while back and the intention behind it got a bit lost because I went into a rant about other things and lost focus on the main part which is I'm overwhelmed and exhausted.

I have 5 dcs one of which is has complex needs. Mobility is the biggest issue which is getting worse as she gets older. Will be using a walking frame and a wheelchair soon. Needs daily physiotherapy and other aids. Needs daily baths and moisturizing twice a day. The smell of which lingers even after baths! Cognitive delay which means she needs extra support with speech therapy and homework.

All of this means it's actually a job in itself, I am her registered carer. I'm also working 30 hours and my other kids, though not SN are demanding. My eldest is off to university and if I'm honest im feeling a bit low. She is a constant support to me.
I wake up early, come home and it's non stop till bed time and I don't feel I'm properly caring for my SN daughter!

I feel pulled in lots of different directions and because I'm so busy and look put together others don't really know how I really feel. I fear if i tell them they'll feel sorry for me or offer unnecessary advice.

I think I just need a rant!

(((hugs)))

It sounds like you have a lot on your plate.

Bumping your post for more qualified posters to give advice. [Flowers]

That does sound very overwhelming . How old are your dc? Do you have a dp who helps at all?

I think you need to try and carve out some time for yourself every day, start small with 10 mins just so you can breathe.

Is there a friend that you can just be honest with about your situation? You may find it a relief to get it off your chest in real life. Sympathising with someone isn’t the same as feeling sorry for them, and even if they do it isn’t the end of the world and it doesn’t mean they don’t think you’re doing a great job.

What do you think would help?

Have you had social care assessments? A carer's assessment for you and an assessment from the disabled children's team for DD.

Sadly, I think this is all too common among parent carers and, is why too many have no other option but to stop working.

Thank you .

Oddly when I start talking about my situation I get a bit choked up and teary. Like I'm barely ot keeping together.

I'm going to talk to the carers team again. Haven't really had a proper assessment for a few years.

Last term I had to leave my professional (although part -time) job because I couldn't cope with the added stress.

It might also be my mindset. Even though I have plenty to do as a carer I feel I should be doing more, fulfilling my potential, earning more, keeping up my skills...

I also fear how society will judge me