DS constantly asking for food, toddler DD now copying

[intothewoodss]

My DS is autistic ad has ARFID, but repeatedly demands his bland snacks throughout the day, from the minute he wakes up to the minute he falls asleep. We have tried structured snack times, it doesn't stop the asking, which is constant, he will literally follow me around the house saying 'Crisps? Crisps? Crisps?' over and over again, until I crack and either give him the crisps or say no and he hits me. He must ask me 200x a day or more. It's actually driving me insane.

Anyway, that is bad enough but now his 3yo sister, who is verbal and has very good understanding, is doing the same. Following me around repeatedly asking and throwing fits when I refuse.

I have no idea how to get out of this cycle and I am genuinely worried for my sanity.

You need to not crack with either of them. They're getting a reaction and sometimes getting crisps.
Have a set consequence for hitting, even if its you just walking into another room, say no and walk away.
No means no.
Eventually they'll get it. The instant you cave, it rewards them.
A 3yo won't understand why its ok for her brother to do something and not her (not that her brother's behaviour is OK, but you shouldn't be holding her to a higher standard). She will see him and copy him, asking her to behave better is not fair, no matter how much understanding she can pretend to have, she's still 3 and not able to think things through in the moment.

Hold your nerve, it will get better as long as you don't cave.
Don't react with anger (negative attention is still attention) and find something positive to say about something/someone else to distract them. If that doesn't work, walk away.

It does sound maddening.

Whether it’s worth it depends on what would happen if you caved and just gave them crisps every time. You’ll know the situation far better than a random stranger on the internet - but unless you’re sure they’d eat themselves into obesity there might be a case for just giving them the damn crisps over and over until they get bored and saving your sanity.