Can I do anything? Nursery suggested it had space for DD on tour now forms in they don't..

[BButtercup21]

I'm wondering if I can do anything about the fact that during a tour of a nursery for my DD who has a SEN we were advised by staff there would likely be space. Now we've submitted the paper work they say they have no space until mid next year. I have a suspicion that this may be because my DDs condition but have no concrete evidence.

Has anyone encountered this or have any advice? Feeling gutted as their SEN support/policies seemed very good.

Yes this happened to us. My son was excluded from nursery due to biting and they never even tried to put measures in place to prevent it. Then we were left without a nursery place and every place I phoned said yes they could accommodate him and these were private placements as I was told the funding was now unavailable for some reason. We visited so many who said there was a place and as soon as we got there the vibe completely changed and we got told that no places were available until next year. This was always by email and when I would question it I would get no reply. We have had so many doors close and we are now waiting for a paid placement over the summer in the hope he will get some exposure in a setting before school. Portage were useless btw.

Sorry to hear about your experience. Sounds like this may be more common than I thought sadly. You hit the nail on the head... rejection via email after a positive face to face...

If a nursery can’t meet a child’s needs they won’t be able to take them on. They should however be honest and tell you that’s the case. Lying about space availability is shitty practice.

I completely agree, I just feel powerless as it is a hunch that this is the real reason.

My son although not officially diagnosed has autistic traits. These nurseries say they are inclusive. How do they know they can’t meet my sons needs without even getting to know him? I feel all his preschool years have been taken from me through worry, endless phone calls and assessments and I’m now battling to get him support in school, which is another story. It should never be this hard to get educational support for a child. I feel for you BBbuttercup21. The hunch was very real for us and the only advice I can give and this is only by my own experience is to keep trying. I literally went online and contacted every single nursery in my area and further out. Someone also suggested a childminder setting to me but I didn’t go down this road. I hope things work out for you 💐

I'm so sorry to hear about your experience. I hoped we'd be fine given that all nurseries say how inclusive they are but this clearly isn't the case. Its so sad that my DD isn't even 1yo and has potentially already experienced discrimination. If I had concrete evidence I would take action, it feels like all I can do is ask difficult questions.

I totally understand and I’m so sorry for your experience as well. I think it’s tricky taking action as it was suggested I could complain, which I didn’t do officially but I was asked to review a nursery on my experience online and I did not hold back. Two weeks later I get a phone call saying they all of a sudden had a place. I firmly rejected it as I didn’t want my son in a setting where he clearly wasn’t wanted to begin with. It’s a very difficult situation and for every door that closes I hope it leads you to the best setting for your child

Yes this happened to me. We had a nursery place agreed, then when I let them know about my son's disability they suddenly became full. I was angry about it, and I still am every time I walk past the nursery, but I am glad I found out about their attitude before he started there. It is their loss! He is now at a brilliant nursery who are very supportive and well-matched to his needs.

TheStarMachine - I am so sorry to hear that another experience like this. They claim to be inclusive but still have their prejudices. I also think a lot of sencos lack understanding. I am happy to hear this experience led you to a better setting.

Thank you Stupidsadsack. I think some SENCOs have the title in name only and don't have a clue. It was a kick in the teeth at the time to know they didn't want him but it 100% worked out for the best and his current nursery love him.

I absolutely agree with you TheStarMachine. A lot of sencos don’t bother to get to know the actual child and see beyond their challenges. Best wishes to you and your little one 💐