Help! on what grounds can ASD kids be excluded from mainstream?

[aquariusmum]

I've just had my first meeting with the ms nursery teacher about my ASD boy. He's only been there since September and I thought it was all going quite well. But the teacher seemed to be hinting that he was disrupting class and not learning anything. Is this code for, they want him out. Does anyone know what grounds they have to have to kick him out? Surely they must give it more time? He has been very good, starting to imitate kids, sitting nicely for register, but has had tantrums at times and last week hit his one-to-one - but he has never never showed any aggression to other children. Please help!!! I feel desperate. The SEN schools I saw in this area are totally inadequate so I feel this is my only hope for ms to work.

Does he have a statement? If not i suggest you ring the LEA and ask for a statutory assessment.When you say nursery do you mean preschool? I'm not sure what the rules are for preschool as far as exclusion is concerned. Also did his teacher say what strategies the school were putting in place to help him?

Dustystar, thank you for responding. I was feeling so alone. He does have a statement, and it's all documented in there that he gets one-to-one support etc. They had alluded though to a probationary period and I wonder if they are going to use that against me. We have another meeting in 2 weeks, with the SENCO as well and I think then I can make sure they are putting strategies in place. I already suggested not making him sit down for story time, as it's mainly meaningless for him. But how long do they have to give it/him?? He is in the nursery attached to a mainstream but he is actually a year older as I've held him back a year to give him a better chance.

So does the statement name the nursery as a placement?

Also how old is he?

Yes, the nursery is named on statement. He is 4 1/2.

Well i'm not sure about the rules about nurseies as opposed to schools but with schools there is no 'probationary period'. if they are named on the statement then they legally have to abide by that statement.

At 4 1/2 he doesn't legally need to be attending school or preschool so its possible that the rules are different for them. Do you feel they are meeting the criteria set out in his statement?

Have you contacted IPSEA and asked for their advice?

they are definitely not meeting the criteria in the statement yet, not sure they have even read it! IPSEA is a good idea, and you have made me feel better as yes the school is named on the statement and even though he's in the nursery, it's attached to the school so maybe they are not allowed a probationary period. I think I need to toughen up and go into that next meeting a bit more business-like?

Sadly my experience is that you have to forget about being nice and keeping them happy and instead fight for your child tooth and nail. It may not make you popular but its worth it to get you child the support they need.

I found IPSEA really helpful but they can be hard to get through to (they are very busy) so be persistant.

Meerkat is good for statement stuff so hopefully she'll be on later and can give you more advice.

thank you dustystar, you are right I am forgetting that I'm not in the normal, nicey nicey world of nursery mums like I was for my DD (not ASD). It's not about lovely pictures coming back in the school bag but about legal rights and fighting. I am very pleased you have pointed out to me the statement point though - I had forgotten that section 4 is legally binding on them as well as me. is your DC ASD? what kind of school?

Ds is 7 and has no dx as yet but has a statement and fulltime 1:1. I had to take him out of his first school as they were so crap and put him back in preshcool. The LEA agreed to backyear him as he was so young (july baby) and had had very little time in school. I also applied for a statement that came through the following May.

He started a new school from the reception the following year and did really well with the 1:1 support. He did so well that he made the jump to his natural year group this sept.

He has traits of ASD and ADHD and after seeing the paed again yesterday he started ritalin today and will most likely end up with a dx of ADHD and maybe of ASD too.

Without a doubt that first year when he was 4 and first started school was a complete nightmare and the hardest time of my life so you have my sympathy.

He has been struggling recently for a variety of reasons but had a good day today so fingers crossed that the ritalin will help him further.

Our situations are a bit different but if you want to chat you can either CAT me or email me at [email protected]

Oh and I have an older NT dd too so I know what you mean about how different it is

oh yes of course, I read your strand on ritalin. I think your son sounds very verbal and on the ball though, maybe only very very mildly ASD if at all? I think my son is the exact opposite: definitely ASD, but maybe also should have dx of ADHD. has the ritalin improved your DS's ability to sit still/concentrate do you think? I am turning into warrior aquariusmum from now on - thanks for giving me the boost and yes I would love to email you! not sure what CAT is. You feel so exposed when they first start school, and every rejection feels so personal. Thanks dustystar

DS has quite a few ASD traits but is high functioning so they are not always immediately obvious. I used to think that his ADHD type behaviours might be due to him having ASD but now I think that he has ADHD as well as having traits of ASD.

CAT is contact another talker but I think MNHQ have changed it to contact a mumsnetter now. Have a look at the top of the page. You can email me anyway

We'll be warriors together (beats being worriers which I am most of the time )