So, I've had an interesting/sometimes infuriating journey over the past few weeks looking into private for my 6-year-old son who has HF ASD (Asperger’s) and no EHCP. Just research at this stage (not even sure if we can afford it, but I thought I'd share). What shocked me was the attitude of schools towards children with ASD and other learning difficulties, despite them being very well equipped for SEN. But there are some open options out there.
Seaford College (West Sussex) had been pegged as a school on forums as being good with SEN and ASD friendly...but it seems that they may have recently changed their stance.
I actually phoned them twice, because the first time around I couldn't quite believe what I was hearing when the admissions lady said that they 'no longer consider ANY child on the spectrum no matter how high-functioning (no consideration for the child as an individual learner). The second time I phoned was a week later (not letting on that I was the same person). I first asked about their learning development department. They are very well equipped! But when I explained that my son had ASD/Asperger's the response (albeit a little softer this time) was 'as a rule, they don't take on children with ASD' but that I should 'feel free to pass on school and Educational Phycologist reports' and they could take a look. When I mentioned his noise sensitivity her response was 'we are a busy bustling school and that he might not do so well in this environment and we’d want him to thrive’. My response was to remind her that with smaller class sizes they are going to be a lot less 'bustling' than a 4-form a year entry non-private school (like the one my son already attends).
It did make me laugh that many of the schools took the stance that they’d be doing him a favour by NOT accepting him. Like there is a better alternative for a kid like mine! Well, there isn’t. I mean, where do they think these kids who are not eligible for placement in a special school or SEN unit go!
Other schools such as Frensham Heights (Farnham), Prince's Mead (Winchester), were cautious but a little more open and said it would be dependent on an EP report. Although with FH’s I did get asked a few odd questions that I didn’t much like e.g. ‘how often he wears headphones?’, and in a way that seemed like they were assessing what impact this would have on the image of the school.
The most welcoming schools were Ditcham Park (Petersfield), Banstead Prep (Surrey), St Bede's (Eastbourne) and The Hawthorns School (Redhill), The London Acorn School (Morden), Kingswood House (Epsom) and Hurst Lodge (Ascot). The latter two were the best set up to deal with neurodiverse needs, but you pay for it! I'm not sure about Hurst Lodge, but with Kingswood House, you would have to pay separately for any extra provision (anything from 1:1 tuition to OCT).