Just had to deal with hideous hour-long public meltdown from ds :-(

[dustyFIREstarTER]

The title says it all really

He kicked off when i picked him up from school because he misunderstood his teacher and thought she said tonight was firework night. Cue him running off screaming that she was a liar. He then spent the next 20 mins running around the school in a rage whilst me and his 2 teachers tried to calm him down.

I arranged for a friend to collect dd from her school and went to collect her. When I got out of the car I told him to wait but he got out too and just wouldn't get back in. He's only 7 but he's bloody strong and he was kicking and hitting out at me and dd. After 5 mins my friend said dd could stay with her and she would drop her later.

I had to restrain him as he was kicking and hitting and headbutting me. We ended up sat on the pavement outside her house with me restraining him and him screaming his head off. This went on for 1/2 hour - i'm amazed no-one called the police.

I am now completely drained. I can't even cry about it anymore- just feel empty

No worries 100x

Its sort of nice to know i'm not the only one IYKWIM.

I'm the same as you and sometimes just seem to forget what to do and flounder andmake things worse. Today i was fine and switched into what my mum calls 'professional mode' (she's a SENCO and I'm a childminder)

He calmed down within 15 mins of getting home and he's now singing in the lounge to the Killers album.

Sometimes i can talk him down other times everything I say seems to make things worse. I've no idea why.

Your dd sounds like a sweetie pagwatch

My dd is nearly 9 now and has had enough of being kicked and punched and having her stuff wrecked so has lost patience with a lot of ds behaviour.

However, on halloween I decided not to have a party like we do normally due to his behaviour recently and let dd go to a friends for the evening so that she didn't miss out. he was really upset the night before and she came down to me late in the evening becuase she was worried about him and wondered if she should cancel going to her friends. I thought that was very sweet of her considering what a little sod he's been to her recently. I told her to go to her friends anyway as she deserved to have some fun without ds spoiling things for her yet again.

arghhh!!!

Bloody dh really pisses me off sometimes.

I called him while it was happening and he was busy at work and couldn't talk which wasn't great for me but i understood. I spoke to him about 1/2 hour ago though and he was really arsey with me for calling and stressing him out. He seems to think that me calling him at work to tell him about ds kicking off (which i know is difficult for him) is somehow as stressful as having to physically deal with ds while it is happening. He didn't say it but he intimated that i was out of order for calling him

I've just had a bath to try and clam down but I'm still really pissed off. I'd like to fuck off for a month and let him deal with it day to day and see what its really like. H eowrks 50 odd hours a week and sees ds for about 1/2 hour most mornings and is back after he is in bed most days. Even on his days off he doesn't generally see that much of him and what time he does spend with him he indulges ds every whim and therefore doesn't have to deal with the crap.

Grrrr Sorry rant over

Message withdrawn

My dh has almost no memory of what ds1 was like at the worst stage, between 3 and 9. Because he was at work. So when I describe the ASD behaviour he claims not to remember any of it. Very annoying.
He never saw the meltdowns, the sprinting home from school cos ds (fear of toilets) would poo in his pants half way home (every bloody day for months). Never did the 'hide the uniform' sessions which ds did so he wouldn't have to go to school. Or go on any outing with ds rocking back and forth shrieking 'homehomehomehome'. Never went a friends house and heard ds announce 'this house smells yucky' very loudly and embaressingly.
Hope you're half way through the wine bottle now