Am I doing the right thing?

[snapD]

I'm a childminder & I care for a child with undiagnosed problems including problems with mobility, speech, co-ordination and probably various other things that haven't been diagnosed yet.

Recently his parent were told X would never walk or communicate

Both his parents and I feel very angry at this

• he is almost walking already and as he gets older will be fine if only at the level he is at with some aids
• he already communicates very effectively, not in word but with gesture, expression and we have started him on baby signing

I put a little extra into his care and ensure that all the tiny triamphs are recorded or reported to his parents. I am also going to see the portage people to ensure what I do is right.

I do wonder if I am over emphasising the minor triamphs and paying too much attention to tiny things

Should I be less enthusiastic/positive? or do they need someone on his side?

My opinion would be to go for it, praising any triumphs, even minor ones would only have a positive effects and being enthusiastic is what the job is all about.

As a parent of a child we were told would waslk very late, I would say only record and praise every little achievement if you truly feel the pride too. SN parents don't need false pride or patronising. Sounds like you genuinely care though, so go for it!

Go for it- its th attention to little things that makes the difference. Our CM has been very good with ds3 and been able toa chieve some things that have been impossible for dh and I to make headway on.

I always suggest them but nonetheless www.bibic.org.uk are a great charity 9theyc an help with funding if needed) that offer positive strategies to move forwards and have helped ds3 immensely, taking imo the main responsibility for the langauge he is now developinga year or so after being told it may never happen.

Good luck and well done X

Sorry, just re-read the OP and first time somehow read prasing the child for the triumphs. But more or less what I said before, any triumphs that you notice might not be repeated and if it is known then parents can work on it.

with some children there are only little things and the parents do praise it. Gosh, when dd moved a foot I ran up and down the road and told anyone who would listen!
The triumphs are always good.

That's good

I accept the professionals know best, but to say he will never communicate is heart-breaking - especially when he already does

I'm glad being triamphant about the small successes is OK - I would hate to offend or upset anyone

I wouldn't agree that the professionals always no best, no way. They might have alot of knowledge, but they are not the one's who spend alot of time with each individal person. I don't know how someone can say that someone will never communicate when they are already communicting in their own way beats me. There are more ways than communicating than verbally.

I could give a very good example of this about a child I work with, but would have to go into details and would breech the data protection act. But if someone would say to me that the child could never communiate I would have a few things to say to them I can tell you, because I CAN communicate, to a degree, with this child.

He is 18m old

We know when he is happy or sad (but not always why)
We know when he is hungrey or thirsty (tho' not always which)
He recognises lots of people/toys/pets and he has his favourites
He waves bye-bye and blows kisses, he claps and jumps up & down with excitement when I play music

His mum & dad understand him far more than me which is only to be expected

But he communicates all the time

The childs parents and yourself (being someone that spends alot of time with him) know him best- your the experts not the professionals....!

God I wish I'd had someone like you around when my son was little! I echo others - professionals do not always know best. They spend an hour with a kid then claim to know more about them then you do having spent every moment of their life with them. I have fantasy dreams about meeting up with the "eminent" neurologist who told me when my son was 18 months that he would "never be a communicator". Guess what I read up myself, found him an appropriate specialist, and got him talking. This stupid old fart also said he had "no cognitive function" because my son would not complete his tests (instead he was rummaging through the consultant's briefcase finding more interesting things to play with - which I think most people could have spotted was demonstrating an interest in the world around him). I am sure you are right, and your giving hope and support to the parents will really help them to cope. Big up his triumphs all you can - also would recommend you look into speech and physio therapies for dyspraxia.

Sapnish that Psych was clearly the oppsoite of ds3's who said he had average intelligence 'although it as ahrd to measure as he couldn't understand the tests ad we had to stop'- pmsl! he couldn't understand them because well- he has a low IQ!.

Curently ahev SALt wondering if DS3 has a SLI rather than ASD or delays- claptrap, he ahs marked LD which school etc know and aree aware of. yet we have apperwork 2 eyars old stating he knows his colours- funny, he didnt 2 minutes ago

Moral: you know your child. Ignore the rest!

You need to fan the little sparks to turn them into a fire! I've got the firm the belief that only someone who notices the little triumphs, the emerging skills, will be able to get them most out of a child. Many professionals, sadly, see only the problems. I think you're doing exactly the right thing!

Thank you - I really appreciate your support

good for you for being so positive about this little lad. as a parent it's focusing on all the little triumphs that keep me sane (even though many other parents would take those same things for granted)