How to cope with meltdowns

[lollipoprainbow]

My 8 year old dd with suspected ASD got cramp tonight and had a terrible meltdown, nothing I said or did calmed her down, I tried walking away to calm myself down but that made her worse. Any tips to cope with meltdowns ??

How did the meltdown present?

It can be very individual.

One boy I worked with really responded to deep pressure- weighted blanket, firm hugs, pressure on shoulders,

Another needed lots of space and time - any attempt to 'help' would make the meltdown last longer

Another found 'hiding' really calming - tents, blankets, under tables/chairs

Another found particular music very calming - he loved the sound of a tin whistle

@MillieEpple she was completely hysterical crying and screaming the house down and I just couldn't calm her down.

I agree that its very individual. But i would say you did the right thing to remive yourself for a few minutes to take a breath and calm down. There is a phrase that 'an escalated adult can de-escalate an escalted child' and its very true.

One way to feel calmer yourself is to think of it as a panic attack which it is really, it just looks different ( and try not to take it personally.)

I do feel sometimes once they are in a meltdown you just have to sit it out. Sort of maintain a calm presence that says 'im here for you'. If you can do things like reduce other sensory things like noisy radio /bright lights that might help. You might just need to make the environment safe or encourage her somewhere cosy. And remember her language processing will be shot so dont say much.

The other thing is after a meltdown make sure you give her a long recovery period. A hug tonight and be aware that she will be tired tomorrow and it can take a good 24 hours for the stress hormones to drop. So be extra kind tomorrow.

The intervention stage where you can stop a meltdown tends to be in the build up - but something like cramp is sudden and probably very frightening for her so i guess there wasnt much build up to intervene.

Should be 'cant de-escalate '