School have suggested DS (11) has autism - what does the process involve?

[YreneTowers]

DS1 is 11 and started secondary school in September.

In the last couple of weeks it has become apparent that he is not coping, and is becoming increasingly anxious about the possibility of being told off and getting a detention. His worries are causing him to behave in ways that make being told off more likely - for example by dawdling on the way to lessons and being late, or refusing to do the schoolwork in case he makes a mistake which he will be told off for.

He is very bright, and on paper should have no problem with school as he is more than capable academically, but is becoming tearful in lessons, saying he is stressed, and has recently begun banging his head on the desk or radiator.

He has also had issues in food tech around handling the ingredients as he didn't like the texture.

We have been in constant contact with the school once we became aware he was having difficulties, and today the SENCO phoned me and said they thought he may have autism and suggested we consider asking for a referral to CAMHS.

I understand this is a lengthy process - up to two years - and she mentioned a form which we and the school need to complete.

I work as a Learning Support Assistant with children with ASD, but the children I work with are at infant school and are mostly non-verbal, and already have an EHCP when I meet them. I have no experience with older children with ASD.

This is difficult to answer, as 'the process' is different in different authorities, I'm afraid.
Where I live / work, for example, CAMHS aren't involved at all.

What does seem universal is the length of waiting lists so I would work with the school to get that referral in, if it is something that you think they might be right about.

However, in the meantime, he is still at school every day and incredibly anxious, so you should also "meet" (probably over Teams or Zoom or similar) with the school, to ask how you can work together to support him now - diagnosis or not. Ask them what they are going to be able to do to offer him support long before he gets any diagnosis, or doesn't get a diagnosis. That is going to be what makes a difference, not the diagnosis itself.

Thanks. We have a meeting scheduled for the end of this week.

I've got a 13 year old DS now in y9 with suspected ASD. Around here it's a 2 year wait and currently online video only which DS went non-verbal for so they couldn't assess him. Process here is school refer. Process in old area is you go to GP and they refer. School initially told us that was the process there, GP only gave us non-urgent appointment one month later, DS got stressed so 5 mins late, another months wait, go to appointment no we won't help school do it. School do form, 3 months later its rejected as child hasn't signed /consented box ticked and then told we've missed that round and a completely new form needed. This is after waiting 18 months in old area before we moved. Then we get forms in again and around 18 months later we here but no appointments in person only by video and DS is not allowed any help. DS just screams and locks himself in bathroom, second attempt ended with his hands over ears not talking very distressed and then they sent back to start process again.

But school can put help in place without a diagnosis, and almost all support is available without one. We've had ed pscyh in numerous times, senco support, adjustments in lessons, support form local authority SN team (I had to contact directly). It's far from perfect but we just about make it through and he's doing well academically, socially he struggles but has some friends he plays football with at lunch and he enjoys school. I would arrange a meeting with senco and push for an ed pscyh referral and any adjustments you think might help. School are very good at not giving DS detentions. Reward points also help my DS, it depends on child what they respond to and often trial and error. It could be just general anxiexty rather than autism but an ed pscyh will have a view, can't diagnose autism but will be able to say what they suspect issue is. Though texture sounds sensory which can be linked with autism, the rest of it seen with kids with general anxiety as well as autism. My DS has a lot more flags for autism and primary picked up like obsessions with certain numbers and items, running in circles, very restricted diet, very upset changing clothes, hiding in cupboards at school, running off when panicked.