Comment from my mother has upset me...

[anewname]

DS2 has severe developmental problems, and while we are awaiting an idea of a dx, and waiting for NHS therapies, we (mostly me) have been taking him to physio, up to three times a week but mostly only once or twice a week.

I am in central London and it involves quite a hike on two or three trains to get there, but he has shown improvements and I don't think we should be doing nothing for him, and I can cope at the moment so don't want to stop.

Mum said to DH this morning that she thinks we should move back "home" (Australia) because she is worried about how I will be able to cope taking him to physio.

He is a small ten month old, and I can't stop thinking about what she has said.

PErhaps she is just feeling a bit concerned/protective about you being away dealing on "your own". Nad thinks that you could receive much support nearer to your family.

I would be annoyed about her saying that to DH rather than to me. But I suspect the thing comes from what I mentioned above.

There are sometimes occassions when the local services are "mistrusted" as they are not what you are used to. Perhaps they think you would be able to get more support at home because she is more aware of the "ground" in her own place?

When my nephew was diagnosed with autism, we all thought my sister's family needed to move from they were living (a tiny city in the middle of nowhere with next city being 4 hours away (and nothing in between)). They certainly did a lot to do that move thinking that it would provide access to better support and services. Surprisingly... they have found so much support and more professional help in that tiny place that they would have access to in any other place. Because by a strange but happy coincidence there is a very good school to train teachers on special needs so... they have access to ABA and speech therapist in a weekly basis, special school and even have a childminder who is training to help autistic children, who has done wonders for their child. They wouldn't have been able to find that, or afford it, at any other place.

However, it took them a couple of years to realise how fortunate theyr were. I supose that you may be at that stage when you are exploring the options available, and in a couple of years time your mum would be able to see that whatever decision you take (whether to stay or go home) was the right one.

Maybe, being in Oz, she doesn't realise that buses/trains in London are pretty good and in her mind its a real ordeal (no idea what her Oz city public transport is like). I had someone once say to me that they couldn't imagine how I coped going on the bus. They were American and genuinely didn't realise that London buses are frequent and low floor and go everywhere. Their city has few buses that went every couple of hours.
She's probably also hving a touch of the 'mum' worry and maybe thnking if you were there she could help make it all better