practical tips needed

[tiredybear]

Hi

So I work in a nursery and we have a child who is around 17m who is responding very differently to the nursery setting when compared with his peers. He is still very young and, as well as not being an expert in SEN, I want to avoid labelling one so young. However, having read around on this forum and completing the M-chat-R autism survey, the results came out as high risk.

Of course, I am going to speak to his parents about my concerns but what I would really like to know is if there is anything practical I can start implementing into his daily routine that can help him to reach his full potential.

A bit of background:
He is currently non verbal, he occasionally squeals with delight (water play and being outside) but otherwise doesn't babble at all and generally seems oblivious to language. He doesn't respond to his name for example. We have been working a lot on helping his class to say yes/no both verbally and/or non verbally, but this is something he has not shown any interest in whatsoever.
He doesn't point or look at things when I point.
He doesn't attempt to join in with any of the class songs
He avoids eye contact, but will do so occasionally when at a greater distance.
He doesn't interact with the other children.
He seems unaware of physical barriers. If he wants to get a toy, he will go the most direct route, often knocking others out of the way, oblivious.
He 'works' very well (it's a Montessori nursery), but I can't think of a time when he has done anything different with the 'work'. For example, the 'work' might be stacking rings on a post. He will be very focussed and systematic and do it well. Other children would also use the rings as bracelets, to peer through, throw at each other etc. He doesn't.
He is VERY fussy about food. He will spend a long time squidging it with one finger, exploring the texture, but will rarely eat.
When self-soothing he will often pinch me repeatedly - though there is absolutely NO malice behind it whatsoever, it seems more like a sensory seeking behaviour.

There is lots more, but you get the idea.
I absolutely adore this lovely lad, he is just such a beautiful soul, but he seems very lost in his own world and I would love to help him connect a little more.

Any ideas?

Google intensive interaction and use this approach when playing with him. It’s a good approach as it follows the child’s lead but also gently encourages more interaction.

If he’s non-verbal then after you’ve spoken to the parents you could try using visual support and/or makaton with him.

Thank you so much, have just googled it and will be trying this. I've recently started incorporating simple signs into our day too, so hope this will help, too.

So encouraged to read your post and know there are professionals out there investing so much care.

Ok he sounds sensory seeking from what you've said (water, outside, squishing food, punching). So I would start there. Offer water play, messy play, digging in garden etc. Stay 1:1 with him if you can and mirror his movements. Extend a tiny bit but no pressure for him to copy you unless he wants.

Try some visuals and see how he responds. Eg simple visual timetable on wall, walk him through it at start of day and use simple language.

Then when it's time for lunch show him a board with a sequence of 3 pictures eg Now we're going to wash our hands, then we'll eat at the table, then we'll go for a nap. Use the same pictures and descriptions each day.

I can't help on the practical side and you've had good advice already. I just wanted to add: we got on a lot better when we stopped trying to get our son to play in "typical" ways. He is creative, just in a different way to other children. I encouraged lots of make believe, small world etc because that was so much of what play was to me. It took me a long time to realise that he was just reproducing the actions I'd done with no understanding of why. We got on a lot better when I gave away all the small world and gave him pegboards with lots of designs to copy, packs of playing cards to sort, matching games, puzzles. We gave him numicon very early. He built big square carpets with it and derived the pattern of odd and even for himself at 3. At 5 we let him play monopoly, he insisted on being banker and he was setting up elaborate 4 way games between alliances of toys within a month. The social communication stuff followed on the coat tails of his passion. It's the same today - general "social situations" like cubs were a disaster, whereas a small skill based club that was all about the activity rather than the socialising has given him the platform he needed to develop socially.

As a Montessori practitioner I think you are in an absolutely superb place to give him the very best start. You can also help on the sensory side - playdoh, pouring activities. Also, IMO I think it's vital to make communication rewarding with tangible benefits, in particular when he initiates it. It's a huge effort for some kids to communicate, and it's easy for them to stop bothering if there isn't a clear pay off. It's a huge mental shift to make when you're used to children who are intrinsically driven to communicate and want your attention as a matter of course.

My sons were very similar they did a lot of work on turn taking.