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To be not happy with SEND teacher's comments

5 replies

Wishforyou · 14/10/2020 10:25

Two years ago we sent my son to private school as we felt the local state middle wouldn't meet his needs. He had been seen by the educational psychologist twice at primary, there were some focus issues, 'disruptive' behaviour which was stuff like him wanting to carry a seed around the pupils for them to see, rather than it being passed around from pupil to pupil. Ed psych said he was bright but made some recommendations on how he would learn best (lots of praise, consistency etc). He joined the private senior school in September. They've run some mid-yis tests and he has come out as very bright but meeting year standard for academic subjects. Their opinion is he should be exceeding not meeting. They ran some more tests and they say that he fits the ADHD profile, which is not a surprise to me.
They want him referred to a paediatrician for a confirmed diagnosis. The Head of Learning Development made two comments which have really bothered me and I don't know whether to feed back to the school? The first was that medication may be advisable and that if he didn't take medication we might need to discuss "whether this is the right school for him" the second was that there are more children in the criminal justice system with ADHD and early intervention is key.
My son had detention within a couple of weeks which was for three 'negatives' comprising of a focus issue and two larking about issues. Since then he has not been in trouble. It seems really premature to be talking about exclusion and the criminal justice system and I feel like saying something? Any thoughts???

OP posts:
MoonJelly · 15/10/2020 02:01

It could be worth reminding the Head of Learning Development that the Equality Act applies fully to them.

OneInEight · 15/10/2020 11:37

Spectacularly, insensitive way of suggesting your child MAY have SEN but having said that if you feel that your ds may have ADHD then it is worth getting an assessment so that support can be put in place for him (and there are lots of things schools can be doing before medication is recommended). Whether or not your son stays at this school this will be helpful for him. Private schools can be wary of the risk of other parents complaining about disruptive behaviour and withdrawing their children which is perhaps why you encountered this attitude although I have also had both comments said to me by staff in a primary mainstream. Luckily, my jail bound ds1 is doing very well now (after diagnosis of ASC and good support at school) in a mainstream sixth form college.

Niffler75 · 15/10/2020 13:28

@Wishforyou Oh gosh this situation made me feel so angry for you and your son!
Insensitive and totally unacceptable! Would they say this regarding a child who develops mobility issues? No they would not.
@MoonJelly sums it up!
Let us know how you get on!

Wishforyou · 15/10/2020 15:13

Thank you, glad to hear I’m not overreacting but sorry to hear that I’m not the only one who has had these things said to them! I’ve got a very strong sense of wanting to protect my son because of these comments. He has so much to offer with the right support. Yes I’ve already sought an assessment, I agree that is helpful just not the comments.

OP posts:
Mumofsend · 17/10/2020 22:15

My DDs school are refusing to take her unless we make her calm down aka medication. It's bonkers :(

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