My DS has his assessment with the child psychologist tomorrow, and I'm suddenly feeling all wobbly.

[Pinkchampagne]

I know we need to get on with this assessment process, and I have been chasing it up, so it is good that things are now moving, but I am feeling all wobbly all of a sudden.
I know I am going to have to start facing up to the fact he has big problems, which I have spent years fighting against in a state of denial.

As he is getting older, his differences are becoming more & more obvious, and I know I need to prepare myself for the worse.

Feeling so churned up about tomorrow, and don't know how I'm going to stop myself getting silly & emotional.

Have been sent some details of a holiday club, which supports families who have had or are experiencing emotional difficulties. Apparantly withdrawn children are being targetted in this project, so it sounds like it could be good for DS, but I just don't know if he would be keen to go. He struggles with these kind of social events where lots of other children are involved.

Sounds interesting, PC. Presumably if it is geared to withdrawn children they will be used to children like your DS. Could you go for a day and see how it goes. If he hates it don't go again, if he tolerates it try it for one more day to see if it gets better and if he loves it then that's easy and you can keep going.

Do you have to pay anything though as the trying it out approach won't work if you've paid up front?

There is no mention of any costs. The information has come via the school.

We are back tomorrow to start the tests on DS.

PC, will be there at 8.30 to collect DS2 and take him to school!

Thank you, bubble, you're a star!

Good luck tomorrow with your tests.

Thanks, Niecie.
DS is already saying he doesn't want to go, and that the hospital makes him feel sick.

I don't blame him - the smell is a bit of-putting. It is a shame that these things have to be in a proper hospital with sick people all over the place. The psych services should really be in some nice office somewhere. Ours on the 6th floor with all the paediatric wards - no escape from up there!

Seriously, I hope he feels relaxed enough to cooperate and that he gets something from the session and that they give you some ways to help him at home too.

I hope he feels relaxed enough to cooperate too. He is not keen on going today, bless him.
We also have parent teacher consultations later, which is something else I dread, so it's all happening today!

Good luck pinkchampagne!
I hope your ds relaxes!

Thanks. He did pretty well actually, bless him.
There were all kinds of little tests they did with him today, which included verbal questions, sequencing cards, and copying shape patterns using coloured cubes.
He amazed me with how well he did with the verbal questions, but his problems are with recording what he knows, which wasn't tested today.
She said that her gut feeling was that he doesn't have autism, but that he does have social & communication problems, and there are the big problems with his fine motor skills.
We go back next Tuesday for more tests.

I saw his teacher earlier too, and was shown his books. His writing is so so bad, and he can't record things down on paper properly. His teacher says he has it all there in his head, but can't put it down.
She didn't know what we could do to help him, but has suggested he maybe does his literacy on a laptop. I have spoken to him about this & he seems keen.
She also said he is a real loner, and he will often sit himself away from others on the carpet.
She has also noticed his very poor self esteem.

Glad it went OK PC.

Your DS sounds so much like my DS apart from the self esteem. I wouldn't say that my DS is confident and he frequently says he is rubbish at things but I don't think he thinks he is a rubbish person iyswim. I hope he stays that way.

In the nicest possible way I hope your DS does have depression because it is treatable and you will be able to see him get his confidence back and become a happier child with treatment. Autism isn't so easy to deal with - it is for life so it would be great if he doesn't have that.

You really do need to see the OT though. They will give you a much clearer overall picture. Can the psych not put a word in with them to get them to hurry your appointment?

I don't know if you have ever looked at the Dyspraxia Foundation website but there is a list of symptons on there which I have always felt suits my DS better than the AS label he has ended up with. I was looking at it again the other day for the first time in a few months and I was struck again about how relevant it is to my DS and maybe to yours. I'll do a link if it helps. Dyspraxia symptons

I bet you are happier that today is over and done with!

I feel so guilty re the possible depression & the self esteem issues though, Niecie. I feel in some way responsible. My DS has been through a lot.

Thanks for the dyspraxia symptoms link - a lot of the symptoms describe DS perfectly!

I have had a form through to fill in re the OT, and apparantly school also have one, so hopefully things are moving there.

Hope all is ok with your DS.

Just looked at the dyspraxia link again, and those symptoms just describe my DS1 - he has nearly all of the difficulties listed.

But it isn't your fault Pinkchampagne - I didn't mean to make you feel bad.

You seem to be such a good mother and you are doing everything you can to help your son. It is these conditions, whichever one it has turns out to be, that make children like ours susceptible to being depressed. They have so much to cope with that they are not as resilient as other children. It is one of the big things that worried me about the dx for my DS, the fact that often these children end up depressed. Nobody's life is free of trouble so it seems that it is almost inevitable that they will find it hard to cope sometimes but they CAN get better. Your DS knows he has your support and that you are doing all you can to understand and help him.

DS is OK, thanks for asking, although he has lost his bounce recently but that maybe tiredness after all the new stuff he has had to cope with this half term.

If I ask, he seem to be saying that he doesn't play with his friends much. I am not clear whether he is not seeking them out or whether they are losing interest in him. The SENCO is keeping an eye on him but I wish I could, rather than her.

The dyspraxia stuff is interesting isn't it. We have 14/16 of the symptons for 7 year olds. I still don't feel we have got a true picture of DS with the dx we have. I would have preferred dyspraxia with social communication difficulties but those women who went to the review session but who had never met him decided it should be AS. The problem is that until I am convinced that is what he has I don't feel that I can tell DS about his dx and he is getting to an age where I will need to do that soon.

Hopefully we will see the OT this month and I can talk to her about it. Can you over rule as dx I wonder?

How is your son this evening? Did he seem to enjoy the tests? Do you think it will be easier to go back next week?

I hope the OT questionnaire means the appointment is imminent.

You didn't make me feel bad at all, Nieice. The depression thing is something I have felt awful about from the moment I suspected it. I can't help but feel a little responsible because he has been through a lot.
His teacher says the self esteem may be a little conneted to his dificulties, as he will be aware he struggles with certain things that other children don't.

He seemed happier after yesterdays appt, and says he would like ome of he blocks that he could make patterns with, like the ones he used yesterday!

I hope your DS will look forward to next weeks session a bit more if he has found something to enjoy there. In the end, I think they appreciate the one-to-one attention too!

Do you feel better about it at well? Do you feel there is a bit of light at the end of the tunnel because things are happening at last? I hope so.

I do feel a little better, Niecie. I know DS has lots of problems, and I really worry myself silly for him, but I feel a little more positive now that things are being done, and there is hope that he may receive some kind of help, support & understanding for his problems.

I asked him if he wanted to do his literacy on a laptop, and he answered "No because I've got a pencil case!"

LOL about his pencil case!

I'm glad the second appointment was not as difficult as the first. Sorry - I have missed the catch-ups on this thread.

Ah kids - don't you just love em!

If he is anything like mine I bet any other time he would kill to get a go on the laptop!

I'm glad you are feeling better though.

I have just got a letter from the speech therapist. He has an appointment next Wednesday. It all seems to suddenly be coming at once now!
I also got a letter at school, informing me that DS is going to be discussed in the next school based review.