Choosing secondary school. Desperate for advice.

[ItsMyIssue]

Have to choose mainstream secondary for DS by end of Oct. No EHCP. Bright but needs a bit of promoting and fairly sociable, with a few close friends. Fast forward to Y6 after 6 months at home and the difference between DS and peers is suddenly huge, particularly social understanding and maturity. He’s being called weird and nerdy and seems to be a target for a group of boys and an object of amusement for the girls who get him to ‘perform’ things they teach him from TikTok. We’ve had 3 awful weeks with anxiety and ultimately school refusal. I feel like Im suddenly dealing with a new set of problems and I’m worried sick about choosing a secondary without visiting again and need to speak to the SENCOs. Any help/suggestions about what I need to ask?

If I was you I would apply for an EHCNA. Transition to secondary will only magnify any problems, further widening the gap between DS and his peers. Without support the school refusal is likely to escalate.

In the meantime, because obviously you will still need to apply via the normal admissions round, email the SENCO's of all the local schools. Ask direct questions about what support other pupils with similar profiles receive - social skills, mentoring, counselling, quiet room, lunch club, use of laptop in lessons if appropriate... I found asking how they communicate with parents and if they even reply first/second/third time very telling.

If a school further afield that you wouldn't normally be admitted to would meet DS' needs do they have an exceptional social and medical needs category? It's not easy to be considered under it, but with professional evidence is possible. Even if they don't, if you think it's for the best, apply and appeal if you don't get in.

Have you spoken to his primary school about the bullying?

As DS is now in y6 I can only apply for an EHCNA in ‘exceptional circumstances’. At this point I don’t have any documentation to support social and medical. A classroom assessment from an outside agency was cancelled due to lockdown and I was refused an EP by the school. I have been in contact with school about bullying and have another call booked this week.
I will email SENCOs at the schools and will just have to make the best decision based on this and the on line tours. Three local schools are a definite no already and so it’s now down to catchment area as well as comprehensive banding tests.

Who told you you can only apply in exceptional circumstances? It isn't true. If that is what your LA are saying they are acting unlawfully. The only test is has or may have SEN and may need SEN provision to be made via an EHCP. DS is school refusing so meets that threshold. An EP assessment would form part of a needs assessment.

If a school further afield would meet DS' needs best do apply even if you don't have a chance of getting in via the normal admissions round, you can then appeal.

@ItsMyIssue

As DS is now in y6 I can only apply for an EHCNA in ‘exceptional circumstances’

This is unlawful, so whoever told you this is talking bollocks.

You can apply for an EHCNA yourself. See here:

www.ipsea.org.uk/asking-for-an-ehc-needs-assessment

As for the secondary schools, I would make appointments to speak with all the SENCOs and have a chat with them. You will get some idea of the school ethos and their attitude to SEN from that.

I second PPs re asking for an EHCNA. My son (HFA and bright) was in a mainstream primary. He is fairly sociable and had a few friends, but in Year 6 started to have problems with work pressure and sensory overload. We were told by the SENCO that there was no way he would meet the criteria for an EHCP as he did not need help with work and was quiet and well behaved.

He started at the local mainstream secondary, and it all went downhill from there. Although the SENCO did what she could, and there was a quiet room he could go to, he just could not cope with the sheer size, noise and behaviour of the other pupils. He ended up refusing to go to school for months. Following a very stressful year, we now have an EHCP with a specialist school named for him - things are much better!

SENCOs will be able to help with more general SEN, but from my experience if your child has specific needs, an EHCP is essential so that their needs can be clarified and met.