ASD at three. How has it progressed?

[User1484POP]

I have an almost three year old with asd. He was diagnosed at 2. We have been doing therapy for a year. We have seen some progress but not as much as we hoped.

I know that no one has a crystal ball...but can I ask. What was your asd child like at three? What are they like now?

At 3 my DD was very anxious and avoidant around other children (apart from her siblings). She had short phrases but struggled to use language socially. She was quite fixated on me and rejecting of her dad. She had a lot of routines/rituals around her daily routine which needed to be adhered to. She was incredibly anxious around new people, places, loud noises, dogs. This made days out or family gatherings very stressful.

At 8 she is thriving in mainstream school, with lots of support but no EHCP. Very chatty and engaging, especially around her interests. Confident meeting new people had going to new places. She is much more adaptable and able to go with the flow more, but still has specific routines which are important to her. She doesn't like certain loud noises but is able to cope with them now. (This has had a huge impact on our ability to enjoy life.) She doesn't have friends really but chats to children in her class and is generally very content in her own company.

There's been challenges along the way and I'm sure more will come. But she is generally a happy girl who is so different to the anxious child she was at 3. She needs support with learning but has made so much progress since she started school.

Thank you so much for sharing

it is such a huuuuuge spectrum... it really depends what your child's profile is. DD has also severe learning difficulties and a severe speech and language disorder. She took a totally different path to children who are high functioning.

At 3 she was non verbal, nappies, tantrums etc. Now she is a teen, can talk (more like a 3-4 year old but she is verbal). Is cognitively like a child less than half her age. She is at a brilliant special school. Is happy. we have our moments. She will need livelong 24/7 care but she is happy and life is a lot better than I expected. It's certainly very different to the toddler/pre school years. She is fully toilet trained (day and night). We can go out for walks now without her constantly running off. She can swim, ride a bike...she can read basic stuff, write basic things... do very simple maths.

what kind of therapy are you getting? We never got anything other than a dozen SALT sessions in the preschool years.

@dairyfairies thank you for sharing. Yes such a huge spectrum which I think increases my anxiety if that makes sense? If I had a crystal ball I could just accept whatever that was and move on. But as it is I scrutinize everything he does and read endless stories about asd adults. Sorry I am rambling. It’s just hard.

I am actually in the US so he was diagnosed at 2 and he has been receiving 20 hours of aba a week and separate feeding therapy. Success has been mixed

not even three yet is a hard age. So many things are unknown. We weren't even referred until after 3 (UK - late referral, late diagnosis and no therapy other than support in school). For us, the path DD would take became clearer after 4-5...I remember tormenting myself and wondering how DD would progress. It became a lot easier for me once I accepted what I had to deal with.

Is your DS verbal? how is his understanding?

@dairyfairies my son is a bit of a weird case (I am sure every asd parent says that). He is extremely verbal but pretty non interactive if that makes sense? So it’s hard to judge how much much he understands because he ignores people.