Anybody With A Premature BabeThat Is About To Start Or Already In School-Panicking! - Need Some Reassurance Please!

[MissiMoo]

Hello there I am new to mumsnet - hope that some of you may be able to give me some reassurance! This is the very short version (the long version would have me here all night! Here goes...My Ds was born at 26 weeks weighing a pound! He was so terribly ill and ventilated on and off for first 4 months of life and had 3 Major ops and various other complications NEC (necrotizingenterocolitis-think that is how its spelt bit it is l8!) being the worst op with a temp colostomy and reversal after 6 weeks - home on oxygen after 6 months for a futher 3 months and not looked back since (thank god) health wise but now all the development issues have kicked in and it is worrying me sick. He met most of the initial milestones quite quickly but has always been behind with his speech and has issues with his fine and gross motor skills. Been seeing a SALT and OT and is making progress slowly. Cons has DX him with SLD and possible dypraxia and GDD. She is fab and i do trust her judgement but I am totally paranoid that there is more to it - he has some autistic tendancies - he loves to watch wheels spinning and anything spinning and loves door handles and buttons etc - doe this mean he could be autistic or am I being over the top? His cons is convinced that it is purely a catch up game and is confident that it will come given time and I on the other hand are petrified that shes missing somehting - AAARRRRGGGGHHH! I know I am mking it worse by reading too much on the net probably but I don't know what else to do - my intuition is telling me that he needs time to catch up but there is that small doubt in the back of my mind that he IS dyspraxic and or autistic. Ok pause for breath!! I battled hard for a year to get him a statement (They said he didn't need 1 and then they said he did but should stay in mainstream with minimal support until I really put the pressure on and they gave him a place in the unit-his communication is limited - he understands alot more than he says) and I have just secured him a place in a SN unit in a fab mainstream school - everybody there including me and my other half and all involved in his care think it is perfect for him. I am excited/aprehensive for him, he is pretty good in new situs and environments so I hope he will kike it. Does anybody else have any expereicne of these type of units, successes/ pros and cons? I have so much going on in my head I needed to talk to somebody that REALLY understood - he is such a happy, funny little man and I am truly grateful that he is even here - I just want him to be happy and get the most out of school - maybe this is just me??? am I being overprotective and reading into this too much! PLEASE HELP!!! NEED TO TALK!!!!! Appreciate any help, advice and reassurance

Hi

first dont panic you r not bein over protective.

for a start my eldest son was born premature at 30 weeks weighing 2.15 now a very strappin 16 year old at college. my 2nd son (5 years old) born full term and is autistic. he is is a mainstream school but he is in a unit and it was the best desicion we ever made, they go to my sons needs and not what e1 else expects he should be doing. he is in his 2nd year there now due to go back today. all of his teachers are brilliant and son has now started to be included in some mainstream classes for maths. if you have any worries these people deal with these things day in a day out so talk to them they will put your mind at rest. I hope everything goes well for you

take care
tinky

HI missimoo
My ds2 was born at 28wks & starts at ms tomorrow (chewed fingernails).
Initially we were told delays would correct by 1 yr & then 2yrs & then he was dx'd with GDD & CP. He also had severe language delay but this has improved hugely over the last 12 months.
He is also under assessment for autism, they have given a dx of social anxiety disorder & OCD with autistic traits, but his paed is pushing for a global ASD dx in the hope that it will open up some support for him.
I know that feeling of watching & waiting & wondering if the difficulties are just (as the dr's) say a delay, or more permanent.
If you are an over protective mother then so am I, you sound like a loving mum wanting the very best for her precious little boy.

I'm happy to talk anytime,
Max x

Thank you both so much - you know how it feels when you feel as though you are the ONLY person going through this!! it was so reassuring to hear both your stories - thankyou!

Tinky - it is great that you are happy with the unit option - I feel that it will be really great for him and the best decision for all of us as a family - I hope that he comes on well there fingers crossed.

Max - thanks so much for your message also - Can you let me know how your little one gets on? And maybe I can do the same? would be great to swap stories with sum1 who truly understands - not sure how we can talk on mumsnet or on email?

thanks again

Hello Missi
I'll update you tomorrow, i'm expecting afew tears from him but i guess thats normal anyway. it would be good to talk -email might be easier than mn.
When does your little boy start school, let me know how he goes.
Max