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Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on special needs.

What are the chances

2 replies

Notsodomesticgoddess1 · 17/02/2020 19:06

I’m deeply sorry if I offend anyone as it’s the last thing I want but these thoughts are absolutely eating me up since I met dp. Tbh I don’t really know what I’m asking because despite the constant thoughts I’m quite ignorant on the subject as I cannot find much information.

I would love to have more children in future and have discussed it together however, dp had a sister with severe autism as well as multiple seizures daily which resulted in brain damage. What I’m wondering is, is it genetic? What are the chances of passing it down to future offspring ? I would hate to have to go through that ordeal as I’m sure it’s heartbreaking for everyone involved.

I have a child already that I had when I was very young which I don’t mind because I know I’ll get to enjoy life without people needing me as much as my children but if I were to have a child with a severe disability I would never get that opportunity.

I also see mumsnetters with threads talking about how they resent their disabled child and I can only predict I would feel the same which is so so awful. Again I’m so sorry if I sounded so insensitive but I’m hoping someone can help and if I get abuse it’s okay I feel like I deserve it

OP posts:
DICarter1 · 17/02/2020 19:12

I have two children with asd and adhd. No one else in the family diagnosed with autism. Assume there must be something in the genes. One of the children although hard work doesn’t cause me as much stress as the youngest who has extremely complex special needs. I can see why you’d worry and I think it’s sensible to be thinking about it. Our life isn’t straight forward. I love my children but our youngest has severely restricted our lives. Having a child with your dp, only you can make that decision. You might have a child with no disabilities.

EmeraldShamrock · 17/02/2020 19:15

I don't know what the cause of autism is. If inherited from the father or mother, lifestyle, medication, wifi. Every pregnancy carries a risk maybe have genetic testing done. I love my quirky time consuming brats like most mam's love their DC.

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