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SN children

Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on special needs.

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Original poster

How are you feeling now its "back to school time"?

20 replies

magsi · 28/08/2007 23:05

I am feeling a little apprehensive actually. Ds1 (5.7) will be full-time in ms going up to Year 1 from next week. Previously he has been 2 days at ms and 3 at sn. This was decided at the last placement meeting. I am pleased and excited for him but at the same time I can't stop that feeling of 'have we thrown him in the sea without any arm-bands'. I just think we have to give him a chance to do this and let him find out for himself what he is capable of (which he wasn't really getting the chance to do at his sn school).

Its really daft but I even hate walking through the playground in the morning. Its wierd when you are in 'ms world' when you have a sn child. I just get this overwhelming feeling that we have signs above our heads saying 'unclean' or something and that we really don't belong. Really stupid I know and Ds1 has every right to be there. Its just the sly little looks you get. I know I shouldn't be worried about how I feel and should be more worried about Ds1, which I am. I can tell he feels as out of place as me sometimes.

Still, will put our best foot forward and get on with it holding our heads up high (wishing we were still sitting on the beach in Wales!)

OP posts:

rubyshoes · 28/08/2007 23:44

Hi there just about to go to bed after a really difficult day with ds and was looking for any message relevant to my worries, I don't know what the reason is that your ds has sn but I for the same reason am worride about my ds going in to year 1. He has coped really badly over holidays and has almost gone backwards when I expect all the other children have grown up more over the holidays and difference between them and him will become more obvious? I think what I am trying to say is I know what it is like when your heart aches because you want to protect them from the world x

Just remember on those bad days hold your head up high and walk into that playground, you may think they are looking at you but half the time they are probably daydreaming wondering what they are going to have for tea tonight or is there husband having an affair or god have you seen what that other mum is wearing today did she get dressed this morning, and the ones that are looking are probably thinking what an amazing women you are because it's hard enough being a mum to your average child!!!

Good luck to you and your ds for next week xxx

sphil · 29/08/2007 10:20

DS2 starts school next week - 3 mornings a week at special school. I'm as nervous as hell!

Original poster

magsi · 29/08/2007 14:02

Thanks for the replies guys . Ds1 has cp, a right sided hemiplegia affecting his one side. He can walk but limps obviously and cannot keep up with his friends very well. He cannot talk and uses a communication aid called a 'future pad'. He does some signing aswell but only with one hand. We went into the school this morning just to meet his new teacher because he hadn't had the chance to last term. He had a good chance to see where his new peg was and new classroom which was great because now I feel he is more prepared.

There was a sad moment when we were sitting down with his teacher programming the future pad and putting in his new classmates. We had to delete the old ones and to my dismay the two friends ds1 made last term were not on the new list for his class. He cryed when we had to delete them but I think we managed to make him understand that he would be able to play with them at breaktimes. Its little things like that that are so important to ds1. He is particularly friendly with one little boy (whose brother incidently is autistic) who unfortunately isn't going to be in his class. Hopefully he will make new friends. He has just got new splints and boots for him to wear and he is getting used to these aswell. It just sometimes seems like your child has a much bigger mountain to climb than the others doesn't it?

OP posts:

thomcat · 29/08/2007 16:40

Ohh sorry you feel this way.

I feel apprehensive too but not becasue of any sly looks etc.

I know the jump from reception to year 1 is going to be a big one and know there will be tricky times ahead as she has to learn to conform etc.

I know the not quite being toilet trained will be a bit tricky.

I'm worried her novelty factor will wear off and she'll be on her own, a bit friendless.

There are loads of aspects I find a bit heart wrenching, I just try to focus on - is she happy, does she seem happya nd unbothered bu x and Y. Answer is always yes, she is happy so I try not to let my heart ache over her funny little walk trying to keep up with friends (etc etc) bother me.

It is hard though. I do know sort of how you are feeeling. TC x

needmorecoffee · 29/08/2007 17:53

Sad. I hate DD (3) going to nursery 2 mornings a week but I do it cos I need a break. My other kids are home educated so this feels like a horrid betrayal, especially as I've had to complain to the school cos they leave her lying on the floor (severe CP so can't even play)

Original poster

magsi · 29/08/2007 17:59

Is it a sn nursery or ms?

OP posts:

twocutedarlings · 29/08/2007 18:07

Im worried sick about my DD starting school, at the moment we are having assessments done for aspergers, just had an appointment today with psyc today and the outcome was that she more than likely has AS, but they want to see how she copes first at school before they give her a Dx.

Oh and its also her 5th Birthday!! on her first day at school!! how crap is that

needmorecoffee · 29/08/2007 18:43

Its a SN school Magsi. DD's staement says she should have one to one at all times. Her CP is very severe and she has no independant movement in any limb and can't sit. Hence she can't play or amuse herself. Her intellect is 'normal' so she also gets bored.
Yet I've been in there and found her lying alone on the floor while her keyworker toilets another child for 10 minutes. So I complained to the head about what one to one AT ALL TIMES actually meaqns. The woman then accused me of being over-protective (DD is 3 and since when is this a crime anyhow?) and of making DD dependant. Errr, she is dependant. She needs a assistant to help her be 'independant'.
But still I send her because I need those 2 mornings but I feel guilty and bad and wish she could be home. So I'm dreading back to school.

Pinkchampagne · 29/08/2007 18:50

I am really worrying about my DS going into the juniors next week. he doesn't have a dx yet (going through assessment process), but they are thinking AS/dyspraxia.
He finds social situations very hard, and he needs constant pushing to remain on task. He cannot organise himself at all, and there won't be someone constantly checking that he has put his book into the basket etc.
I really don't know how he's going to cope with it all.

Although our childrens difficulties are different, I think I kind of understand how you are feeling.

Good luck to your DS for his new year at school.

coppertop · 29/08/2007 20:21

I must admit that I'm dreading the return to school. Ds1 (ASD) is starting junior school next week. He enjoys school but the first couple of weeks are usually difficult for him because of all the changes. He'll be in a different part of the building in a new classroom with a teacher who is new to the school. He'll also be in a different class to some of his friends.

Ds2 will be starting Reception part-time. He enjoyed the visits to school last term but it's had the unfortunate effect of leading at least one teacher to believe that he doesn't need treating any differently to his NT classmates. Thankfully the SENCO isn't so easily fooled but I'm dreading the wait to see what happens next.

Original poster

magsi · 29/08/2007 22:41

I think we all have to be strong and think positive thoughts for our children. Its just soooooo hard letting them out of our sight again isn't it?. Its funny, I have sat at home some nights this holiday completely relieved that my kids are all in bed and wondering what carnage will come tomorrow, but I would rather have a life full of madness, frustrations and fighting than send ds1 off to school again.

OP posts:

rubyshoes · 30/08/2007 10:29

NEEDMORECOFFEE i had lots of problems with school and got alot of support from www.ipsea.co.uk i'm sure it has been mentioned before but just thought i would reccomend incase you missed it x

Saker · 30/08/2007 12:17

I feel nervous about Ds2 going back to school - he is moving from the SN unit that he has been in to full special school. Different taxi driver, different school, different kids, different teacher. He has been there a few times for "integration" sessions but I think it will be hard for him at first. When he first started in the unit he found it difficult and they found him difficult and he got shingles which I suppose was a sign of stress. It took him more than a year to get settled there and just as he was really happy and they were happy with him it is time to move. So I do feel apprehensive. On the other hand I am tearing my hair now at home with both children with very different needs (Ds1 is NT but quite demanding) and there's a million things that I need to do around the house/garden so getting them back to school will be good from that point of view.

Saker · 30/08/2007 12:18

Good luck to you all with worries about school - it is so hard ...

FioFio · 30/08/2007 12:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Pinkchampagne · 30/08/2007 18:51

I didn't realise you were due so soon, Fio!

mymatemax · 30/08/2007 23:18

Nervous tremblings here too.. ds2 starts school next week, in ms reception class.
Not sure how he'll get on especially as he has taken to covering his head with his blanket as soon as we leave the house
Good luck fio, hope all goes well.

deepbreath · 04/09/2007 00:35

My dd is starting in ms reception class on Monday, and I'm a bit apprehensive about it.

I'm worried that she might get picked on because she's the same height as kids 3 years older than her, but behaviour-wise is probably a bit behind her real age. She'll be wearing her Piedro boots, glasses, and be going to and from school in her big buggy...

2shoes · 04/09/2007 18:13

nervous as dd has a new class and teacher. but she will be fine. she knows all the young people and loves the ca. But i am a bit shocked that I booked her into respite first day back.

Peachy · 04/09/2007 18:20

Relieved, and very sad for ds3 as all his friends (I use the term loosely- doesn't even recognise them after 6 weeks) start this week and he's ahd to be pulled back until Easter.

Relieved because we had a detrerioration of Sam's agoraphobia that ruined several trips and caused a holiday cancellation (we got there, stayed 1 hour then had to come home). He's at elast happy to leave the hose for school.

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