2020 can already piss off. No one has any idea.

[OhDear2200]

Just that really. Had two massive melt downs today with ASD dc. It’s bloody exhausting and scary. But of course I spend the day sending twee HNY messages not mentioning at any point the violence we’ve had to deal with today. People have NO IDEA.

Also the constant question of; What does the future hold???? So New Year’s Eve can fuck right off because I suspect it will just involve the same shit as 2019.

Have you tried forums with other parents in the same situation ? They might 'get it' more than friends and families who aren't going through this ?

I'm with you, I posted general HNY messages without mentioning that our son refused to eat a normal meal again, or has ripped off most of the wallpaper in his bedroom. I put up this year's calendar and had to note the next available date for a delivery of nappies (he's 10). DH and I lay in bed this morning (DS shut in his room playing for thirty mins) reflecting on the last decade and wondering what the next decade will bring - by the end of it our son will be under Adult Services and we'll have gone through yet more battles to get him appropriate support.

My goal for this year? Toilet training. That's gonna be fun (not).

@backforgood

Yes but I’m fed up with defining my life through Autism. I want my friends and to have a life.

This sounds callous I know. But I will continue and tomorrow is another day.

Thanks for the flowers. I just needed a rant.

Eggs - Good luck with toilet training. You’ll find the strength.

I was pregnant 10 years ago. Little did I know.

@OhDear2200

I get where you're coming from. It's really hard.And you're not callous. It's ok to want friends and a "normal" life.

Do you have a partner or family who can give you some support in RL?

How old is your DC? Do you have any idea what triggered the meltdowns?

@Ellie56 Meltdown was because of a wobbly tooth (sensory overload) and too many social events with Christmas and NY.

Next few days are just at home doing nothing, hopefully that will decompress the feelings and sensory issues.

My family is fab and DH fab. I guess it’s just new year...you naturally think about what’s gone on before and the future.

Yesterday was a reminder that our future will contain some major challenges. That’s not to say we don’t love our DC and very proud, but at times it’s tough.

I’m with you. The last decade has been very very hard - three DC’s (11,9 and 7) youngest two have asd and adhd and the 7 year old also has coeliac alongside her sen. I’m exhausted. Our seven year old controls everything is non verbal and is very like the Tasmanian devil. I’m not sure how I’ll cope in the next decade as I’m very close to complete burnout.

With you too OP, I can’t wait to go back to work next week, my 10 yr old ASD DS has been super controlling, and angry.

The last 6 years have been a shit show tbh, hoping the next 6 will be less stressful, but not holding my breath.

Oh wow. I thought I was the only one thinking the whole Christmas break has been the worst we’ve had in I can’t remember.
Last years Christmas was great in retrospect. This year not.
Roll on next week and school.
My Ds seems to just throw all his aggression my way and my younger sons so I have found it exhausting.
Truth be told the last decade was v hard. By the end of this decade my son will also be in adult services and part of me can’t wait. I feel guilty saying that out loud.. He will be in a supported system then because I feel like every day with him at home at the moment is on borrowed time.

Lesley- I think us parents of children with SN are destined to feel guilt, even when we give and take it all. I always blame myself after a meltdown, ‘I should have’, ‘I shouldn’t have’, ‘etc.

Today was much better, out with the dog in the country and playing music in the car. These are good activities 😀

I’m pleased. We are a resilient bunch. We only need a few things to go well and it turns everything around.
Long long may it continue.

Snap! I’m so fed up of being spat at, cursed at, kicked & thumped numerous times a day all because of a transition or because we are trying to get out of the house! It has been an extremely difficult 2 weeks.

I feel awful because he’s only 6 and I’m constantly wishing him back at school & not trying to enjoy this time with him more.

Why is it so so hard? But we have to keep going for them, glass half full and all that.....

It's horrible and heart -breaking at the same time.

No use but best wishes.

@Sorcs our 6 year old has been similar. I think this is the worst holiday we’ve had. She’s constantly on the move, she wants things very much her own way and if we say no for safety reasons she screams and hits. I can’t wait for her to go back to school. I’m starting a new job next week and I’d hoped to be refreshed but I just feel knackered.

@DICarter
Oh my goodness that’s tough going starting a new job! At least it might take your mind off things & give you a break away from the house if nothing else.

Good luck!