Went to see our Neurologist yesterday - have only seen her once before, 3 months ago, as our old Neuro retired. She said last time that she thought there might be something on the MRI scan (this had never been picked up on before) and this appointment she came back with a definate area of damage to the brain. It was reassuring to know that we could see the damage (and it will give our solicitor more to go on), but I now feel depressed somehow. At first I was elated. I have always (secretly) blamed myself for DS2's brain damage, but yesterday it was confirmed that it happened around the time of birth. In once sense, this was a relief for me and I know it provides ammunition for our solicitor. I had an horrendous 2 weeks admitted to hospital before DS2 was born, and then he wasn't treated appropriately after birth, so we have always blamed the hospital for his brain damage. Now I have got over the initial excitement of the discovery, I am feeling quite depressed. It somehow seems more tangible now. He HAS got brain damage and there's nothing we can do about it. Of course, this discovery won't change DS2 or the way we treat him at all. It's more my feelings that have changed. My husband also feels the same way. Is it normal to feel this way after such a long time of living and dealing with DS2's disability?