Parents who have more than 1 autistic child: how do you cope?

[Soumia]

Dear mums...brave mums I would say.

It is a huge challenge to have an autistic child...so it is definitely double the hard work.to have 2 or more autistic kids in the family...

However, from my research and findings...i realised that parents who have many kids (Larger families) would cope better with their autistic kids.

I personally, have 4 kids...two of which are autistic and my neuro.typical.kids (although younger) are very much helping their autistic kids in many ways...

However, would they be negatively affected somehow in the medium.to.long.term by their siblings autism?

How can we as parents create a healthy rich beneficial and balancing atmosphere with these neuro.diversities?

Please share your thoughts ...ideas.. any experiences..

Thanks

I have 1 diagnosed autistic child and 1 who is being assessed. 2 with other disabilities and one who isn't disabled. It's hard. School holidays are about survival. Dh suggested I got a job now that youngest is 5 and I honestly think if I did that I would have a breakdown. The constant battling for help in school, dla etc is the worst part with the incontinence coming a close second. Also juggling their various different needs. Dc1 and dc5 need loads of exercise and dc2 needs to rest. Dc2 and dc4 lost their dla recently due to cuts but their disabilities haven't changed. It's not just the money, it's the recognition that my dc need more care and attention than non disabled children.

The positive thing is that they are all very caring towards each other. Dc1 and dc2 in particular support each other at school. Also disability sports has become my lifeline. I take the older 3 and watch them do different activities. It's lovely watching them enjoying themselves and I get to chat with other parents in similar situations.

I'm mum of five, they younger two have autism. Tbf it was never the dc that were the greatest challenge even though the younger two have significant needs it was the battles. Battles around education in particular that were particularly draining, battles to get the support for their health needs as well.
I suspect when the dc are part of a large family it's more that the difficulties and needs make up a smaller picture than if you only have two children both with autism rather than larger families coping better. I am now a single parent to the younger two with autism (marriage was a casualty) and the older three have left home and are independent. The dc's needs now feel pretty oppressive, although ds goes to stay at his Dad's once a week, most likely because I don't have the others at home for light relief.

2/3 of my kids have autism. It’s definitely more stressful. I try to make sure my older NT child gets to do as many activities as they’d like but over the years it has been stressful trying to balance it all. The child who doesn’t have asd thinks I favour the children with autism. We end up unable to do things as the kids with autism can’t plus the general stress of living with them. My dh and I end up splitting the kids.

Thamks for sharing your experience... you inspired me about sports activities..

In fact i have been thinking of horse riding or equine therapy. Have you tried if?

What about judo?

Karate?

Swimming

Running

I have heard that swimming would help autistic kids regilate their breathing

Other mums...Can you please advise which dports best suits autistic kids?

Thanks

@Soumia my dc's have done kayaking, paddle boarding, inflatable rafting, swimming, tree climbing, archery, laser pistol shooting, tennis, dodgeball and powerchair football.

They enjoyed the kayaking best. Inflatable rafting was great fun for my nt 8 year old but a lot of the children in the group struggled with being in a small space with lots of other people. I think it depends on their personality what sports would work. My autistic 13 year old is happy to take turns or wait in a queue as long he doesn't have to talk to anyone waiting. My 5 year old wouldn't cope with waiting for anything or the noises in a swimming pool.

What about bedroom and sleeping?

Do you advise me to keep.autistic kids in a separate room ftom my.other NT child?

I honestly think that the way we make them.used to...will be the way they accept most.

Therefore, I try to create a mainstream.balanced life style at home (i have 4 kids ...two of them have ASD).

Because my kids are not severly autistic...my daughter is high functioning...while my son is still.nonverbal and would ultinatrlg aim for them to be integrated in the mainstream.society...

Please advise me...i dont want to.commit.mistakes...

Thanks

Up... how do you manange the NT vs. Autistic battles on a daily basis?