Taking things literally?

[Imustbemad00]

There’s a few things I’m questioning with my 6 year old regarding asd. We’re awaiting an assessment.
In terms of communication, social, and repetitive behaviours, he has some problems but not severe and not obvious. In some ways socially you’d observe him and think he’s absolutely fine, in other situations he struggles. The paediatrician described him as a puzzle.

He’s fine with communication, good vocabulary and can have a conversation. What I’m questioning lately is his ability to understand sarcasm, exaggeration and taking things literally. I think these are areas I could mention at the next appointment but I don’t know if difficulties with these things are completely normal for 6 year olds anyway?

He does sort of understand humour and that sometimes I’ll say things I don’t mean as a joke, and he makes similar jokes with me. Will pretend he’s lost things, done something ect as a joke or a trick eg “there’s a spider behind you” when there isn’t.

Ime, it’s normal for a 6 year old with ASD or a language disorder.

Ime, it’s normal for a 6 year old with ASD or a language disorder.

his ability to understand sarcasm, exaggeration and taking things literally. I think these are areas I could mention at the next appointment

Yes, do mention this, it's relevant.

Don't forget, autism is made up of a lot of traits in different groups, not all autistic people have all of the traits in every group. Every individual has their unique number of traits and a unique number of groups, so one person diagnosed with autism can present very differently to another person also diagnosed with autism.

Another phrase you'll come across is a spiky profile, that's where in tests for things like language comprehension, some children will have average or well above average scores for a lot of the components of the test but very low scores in other parts of the same test. This is very common in ASD and other conditions.

He has quite a few traits but not consistent in one area. He can be fine socially in lots of ways, can make friends in soft play ect, but struggles in larger group situations.
Struggles with emotions, but does understand them.
Has a great vocabulary, mostly understands jokes but can sometimes take things literally. But not always and not to extremes.
Doesn’t have repetitive or obsessive behaviours but has phases of things he’s interested in (normal childhood things) and is almost obsessed by that particular thing and likes to collect things to do with it (toys cards ect).
When younger had some sensory issues and issues around routine but seems to have grown out of these a bit.

I took DS to the dentist yesterday. The dentist asked "can you open your mouth." Ds very proudly said "yes" and then lay there with it closed until I waved at the dentist to read his notes about taking things literally and he then said "will you open your mouth now" which actually worked. Its definitely a thing. The opticians is a nightmare too.

Hi OP I have a 13 year old son with SEN. When he was two he started showing some physical signs of autism. As I have worked in this sector most of my life I put things in place to help calm them down. When he was four he moved the goal posts and displayed other traits but again we gave him the necessary support and they calmed down too. He’s done this all his life really. My son is very funny, is a great communicator, very sociable etc however he needs constant behaviour management. He’s never really fitted into the autistic spectrum box because there isn’t one really. Just a massive dial. Get to know your son and what works for him. Try not to get hung up on labels. They are just a diagnosis box to put you in to help with ehcps, dla etc

@WitchyMcpooface I actually agree with you. I work with children too and we cope ok. I’ve wondered what I’d hope to achieve with a diagnosis, I think mainly its for other people benefit than ours. Id like to be able to explain that there’s a reason for certain behaviours so we don’t feel judged. In terms of practical support there’s not much more anybody could offer really.

Life can be very difficult for kids that are not diagnosed, because they don't get any support. At some point, which varies from child to child, they can literally fall apart with the stress of trying to fit in because they are so aware of their differences and frankly their peers often single them out as different, yet they have no explanation for why they are different. Starting the diagnostic process at that point can add a couple of years to the process of trying to put them back together.

Some comments here on the benefits of diagnosis.
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/primary/3635164-ASD-diagnosis-to-pursue-or-not?pg=1

Comments on wanting to avoid diagnosis
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/3629648-to-avoid-getting-my-son-diagnosed?msgid=88307892

There's lots more on MN, have a look through past threads.

Right now, your son is only 6 and you aren't seeing him as very much different to his peers. If he is autistic, that's very likely to change as he grows. A diagnosis can't make him autistic, it's a lifelong condition, he either is or he is not. Diagnosis will decide that.

Children are not automatically given a diagnosis because their parents asked for a referral. Children are rigorously tested and observed often by a team of medical professionals over quite some time and if they don't meet the strict criteria, they are not given a diagnosis.

Age 6-7 is when difficulties in social communication become more obvious in the playground and elsewhere. I wasn't convinced ds needed an assessment at 6 but at 10 while he understands metaphors etc when reading, he needs them pointed out in speech.

I’ve wanted a referral for some time. Finally got one through CAMHS, so it’s not that I’m reluctant. I just don’t think he’ll ever get a diagnosis. In my heart I’ve always known there are things that make him a bit different and he gets a lot of support at school. He has friends, although as he is getting older I’ve noticed his friendship group changing as the very boisterous boys he used to play with he now doesn't so much. I think he finds it hard to manage situations with such big personalities. He’s still friends with them and fine if we meet up at the parks ect one on one, jist not the big group. He tends to play with more placid children at school now. He definitely has a best friend though.