Toilet training a child with a speech delay.

[Eachreachpearmum]

Hi ya. I was wondering if anyone has any tips on toilet training a child with a speech delay (who also withholds?)
My son is 3.2 and although he is getting there with his wees in the potty, he is withholding his poos and will only go in his nappy after lots of withholding. We are on day 9 of training. He has always withheld since he was one and is already on a stool softener.

He has some vocab but not really at the stage of saying when he needs to go. So far we’ve read books, watched poo goes to poo land, tried flash cards, used rewards and sticker charts etc. I don’t know if it’s a case of not being ready or just a fact that it will take him a lot longer than expected. I have posted a similar question in the toilet training section on mns but with no responses. I suppose I’m wondering how long to keep going? Thank you xx

My ds has asd, we started toilet training him at 3.7. It took him 2 months to start asking to poo in the potty so I think you just need to give it time. Day 9 is still really early.

Thank you so much for your reply. It’s all too easy to get side tracked by the parents who toilet trained their kids in 3 days etc. I guess I just need the reassurance to keep going and to expect it to take months. The withholding will all be a problem.

I potty trained my DS at 4.5 years and it took the entire 6 week holidays! I swear I was a little bit insane by the end of it.

Thank you. I’m wondering if I should have waited until he was a little older.

If he’s getting there with wees then I’d keep at it. Just expect poos to take longer. Lots of patience and gentle persistence is needed once you’ve really decided to go for it. If you don’t think he’s making progress at all then it might be worth reconsidering.

Does he use any visuals for communication? Pictures or Makaton?

No he doesn’t although I’ve just got some flash cards to use as advised by health visitor. He runs and hides when he wants a poo then withholds. Been advised to try to teach him to point to nappy picture so i can put that on him but then he still withholds. However, getting there with wees and so proud when he gets to empty his pot. I think poo is also a sensory issue for him too.

When you take him to the potty use a potty visual if you have one. Hopefully in time he can use it to indicate he needs to go, if he’s not able to do so verbally.

Thank you. Think I’ll print out a couple of sets so the nursery can use it too. X

Hi my daughter doesn’t talk (very limited language) but she signs potty. Either tapping her shoulder twice or around her bottom.

We ask her every hour and tap so she knows what the sign is too. We are on week 3 and other than the odd accident we are dry through the night and clean.

It’s one of the things that she has picked up very quickly !