I’m beyond stressed and hate life at the minute

[Blossom4538]

So hard with Dd (ASD) over the past couple of months. Pure worry, stress, aggression, tears. We used to cope well but DH and I are falling apart

no advice just a hug from me to you, hang on in there xx

It's very draining. I promise you it will get better. sometimes just some time mulling over everything away from your ASD child puts things in perspective.
There have continued to be some bad times, but mostly things are going much much better. Ds2 is 17.
I have to look after my own health, and my own mental health, distinct from the fact that it is affected by having a child with SNs. Sometimes you have to reflect on your own way of doing things, what matters to you, what you like doing, swimming, music, shopping, walking (?) check your vitamin levels (Vit D, Vit B) give yourself permission to take things easier than someone else might who did not have quite so many challenges. tonight we had oven chips for example...

How old is your DD?

My Autistic DS is 15 yr 10. This term is challenging at school as it's always exams, school hall in use for exams, school trips and changes. We notice a dip in behaviour. School were on the phone today after a meltdown (he did stay in school which is something). We discussed that this has been the pattern for a couple of years - worse this year though.

One of my favourite bits of professional advice from over the years was if you give 110% of yourself it still wouldn't be enough to meet their needs. Therefore you may as well keep a bit of yourself back for your own sanity. It helps me feel less guilty.

I don't do a lot out of the house but I have one or two small things I do. We have a family allotment I can escape to, DS has his own shed there which he loves.

Is there anyway you could wangle a sanity break for yourself every few days. Just a small thing to step away from your current reality - a trip to the cinema, long afternoon stroll with a friend?

Council budgets are ever tighter but its still worth applying for a careers support package. You can also apply for support for your DD to attend activities. If you can get support or can afford to buy in some support a few hours a fortnight being a couple not just tag team carers for your DD can help you survive the rough bits.

It’s incredibly tiring. The guilt and worry is so draining. Things seem to go in waves and you might find you’re entering a new phase of understanding from her soon and things will ease up.

Thank you all. Having a chat with camhs seemed to help a little, even if just to vent really!

I really, genuinely can’t tell you how much I appreciate your messages too x