now THIS is why the school should listen to me!

[aloha]

Ds's assembly today. We now have the blooming home school book at last, full of tales about how ds is obsessed with the microphone, won't leave it alone, is being given warnings (POINTLESS YOU FOOLS) and taken out of the hall if he continues to try to use it. He runs away, won't cooperate, they don't think he'll cope, they can't control him, will have take him out, hope that's Ok blardiblar. I'm fed up with this....so...I make a social story with pictures - ie
I have a special assembly today. I am looking forward to it.
I say my line really well.
I will go into the hall quietly with the other children
I will sit quietly until it is my turn to speak.
I will say my line clearly into the microphone which will be fun
Then I will sit down with the other children.
When I fiddle with the microphone makes everyone sad and cross.
Fiddling with the microphone spoils the assembly
I will just stay in my place and sit quietly and then everyone will be very happy with me. I will be proud of myself and get a sticker. (pic of ds with big smiley face, as sticker on his t-shirt and a big tick)

Then I made little cards with words like 'sitting quietly' and 'no playing with the microphone' on and more pictures (eg of ds playing with the microphone with a big cross on it)
I work on them in the am with ds. He is very excited and motivated by them (esp the smily face pic at end and sticker)
I go into school to deliver the social story thing and find ds fiddling obsessively with the microphone and staff standing around looking gloomy and hopeless. I go to ds 'Look ds, I can see you like that microphone. It's great isn't it. I bet you wish you could talk into it all day.'
'I want to talk into it for all the assembly'
"That would be fun eh, but how many children are there?'
'25'
And how many microphones?
2
How many would you need for all the children to have one each
25
If I could make 25 microphones appear right now for all the children I'd love to do that'
"But you aren't magic mummy"
"No I'm not"

Ds lets go of microphone and is completely calm. I say, 'OK, remember the story. Remember how proud you will be when you manage it all. Who is the boss of your body?"
"My brain"
"Great. You can tell your body to sit still and not fiddle, can't you?"
"Yes"
Then I gave the cards to his LSA to use them to support and motivate him.

Result: Well ds is clearly v stressed by full hall of kids and adults, loads of noise etc, and he is fidgety and chewing anything he can reach, BUT he stays on the stage the whole time and does not touch the microphone for a minute except to say his line, and joins in with the songs and actions.

So why the blooming heck don't they listen to me in the first place, eh?

Oops, that was long! Sorry. But cathartic to post anyway.

sometimes people don't get words, just actions

seems to me its a real life social story for the teachers ... fingers crossed they learn eh?

oh and very well done H .. big from me to you

Just goes to show that parents do know best! How old is he Aloha?

I hope I also showed the school that it is not the end of the world to let a parent in now and again and that I do have some help to give - I'm not the enemy!
It felt good just go in and do what I was dying to do, which was to show that it's not just the school environment that makes him behave well at home and not at school - it is how you handle a child with Aspergers. It really makes all the difference.
Warnings, sending to he head, all the things you can do OK with 'normal' kids, don't work.
Thanks for the Twiggers!

he's five.

Well done Aloha and Aloha's DS.
I am so pleased that your DS had such a succesful assembly, and that the staff had a demonstration of how it can be made to work constructively for everyone.....with a bit of trying and listening.....well done.

Good for you Aloha Its great to hear about the good stuff.

Actually he has been given a very nice new LSA - a man! V rare I think. Quite young and trendy. He stands out a mile tbh! But he seems really open to new approaches - praise the Lord.
I just thought, I can't stand back and ds humiliated in front of his whole year, all the yr1s and the parents, so just went in with big smile and determined air, was v sympathetic to their problem but just did my thing with ds. Am that it worked!
They were over the moon with him! To an outsider it would still have seemed that he was a bit odd and fidgety (not that anyone watches anyone else's child ) but to them it was a miracle.

Actually he has been given a very nice new LSA - a man! V rare I think. Quite young and trendy. He stands out a mile tbh! But he seems really open to new approaches - praise the Lord.
I just thought, I can't stand back and ds humiliated in front of his whole year, all the yr1s and the parents, so just went in with big smile and determined air, was v sympathetic to their problem but just did my thing with ds. Am that it worked!
They were over the moon with him! To an outsider it would still have seemed that he was a bit odd and fidgety (not that anyone watches anyone else's child ) but to them it was a miracle.

You know what?

I keep seeing headlines about the Tour de France, and I am overwhelmed by the sheer effort that the cyclists put in, but every time I think about the huge persistence and determination and uphill struggle that parents of SN children have to create success and the right environment and support for their children - Aloha, Anniebear, everyone who has dealt with assemblies this week - a yellow jersey each!

Yay. Well done him and you Aloha

Well done to you and ds, Aloha.

Of course I now expect to see lots of posts from you discussing laminators and the relative merits of velcro for the stories and pictures.

Thanks Blu! It's an uphill struggle alright, and so much worse for others. I take my rainhat off to them, I really do. And I've statementing to come! Aargh.

And I did laugh to myself when I suddenly thought (when using picture cards to help him get dressed) oooh, I could laminate these

Aha! The lure of the laminator.

Well done ds and you ! I hope you have proved a point to them. [stick tongue out emoticon] Is ds staying there , for now at least ?

Twig's right about a RL social story for the teachers.

Well done to ds. Hope the school has FINALLY taken the point.

Well done to you & your DS, Aloha!
The social stories sound like a good approach with positive results. Where did you find out about them?

Sounds like you are educating the school on a thing or two...lets hope they learn from this & follow it up at school.

I may have to look into some of this for my DS because I'm having big struggles atm.

Liking the sound of the young trendy male LSA. Why can't there be a few of those at the school I work in?!!