How can they diagnosed dds autism?

[Jennifer124]

I've thought dd who is 8 is autistic for a while. She has always had sensory issues, personal space issues and been a stickler for routine, but recently (last 18 months or so) has had meltdowns that are awful, violent, so unlike her, these can stem from her not having the "right" socks for school or running out of milk so she had to have water instead of milk for her bedtime drink.

The more time goes on the more I'm convinced she's on the spectrum. But the thing is, outside of the home she never ever has these outbursts. She's polite, intelligent , has friends, she is lovely. And school have seen no signs of anything.

Am I right in thinking they will no way diagnose her based on our anecdotes and talking to her for a small period of time?

There's a lot more that leads me to believe she's autistic but the point is, most of it is only at home. To the outside world she is an amazing, well behaved, happy, sociable little girl (which she is at home. She's not naughty, it's when something sets her off, she doesn't cope)

We had a similar experience. I felt exactly as you do so never raised it was school/gp.

I bitterly regret that now as she started to fall apart in y5. By y6 she was self harming and now she’s in y7 she’s having suicidal thoughts. She diagnosed just before she started y7.

My dd was diagnosed by the clinical psychology team who have been nothing short of amazing. We’ve just been on a parenting course and they are so knowledgeable now about how girls present and how they can mask while at school. So much research has been done recenty on girls with asd.

Go and have a chat to your gp and ask for a referral.

Yes, they will be able to diagnose. While ados is not great for girls, it works. Eg, in some modules the ‘tester’ begins a story. The way s child continued it (if they do) can indicate a lot eg, social imagination, theory of mind etc etc. I have 2 dds diagnosed and it really brought things to life that I didn’t realise. In addition, we did a 3di interview, which talks about your child’s development ( eg, did they babble, point etc).

Thank you that's really helpful. We have been to the gp a while ago and are waiting for a referral ( they said should be within 18 weeks but urea been 22 weeks, we rang and they said she will be seen soon buttie diagnosis but in the meantime ask her school to refer us to emotional wellbeing service to help manage her behaviour)
She doesn't like talking about how she's feeling but will agree and disagree if they do the talking. I really hope we either get a diagnosis or they explain why they don't think she is. I'm dreading being told she's not autistic and it's just her behaviour/ our parenting :(

For a diagnosis*
Not buttie :/

They won’t ask her about how she’s feeling. They may ask her to tell them a story. Or they will tell her one with a cliff hanger and she responds. My dd was 7 (and other dd 5) nd it would have been playing with an adult. Hopefully it will be ok. Also, symptoms only need to present in one area, but doing a home or school observation may happen. Good luck

Also, I think we spendso long wondering if it is ASD. That at the last minute we wonder what if it’s not! I did also and many others I’ve spoken to. Looking back, why did I ever doubt it!

Sounds very similar to my DD she didn't show many behaviours at school.
Funnily enough though when I raised my suspicions with them and they started observing her they started to pick up on little things like when the class laughed she's a few beats behind, she apparently does a lot of mirroring other kids behaviour so she fits in.
One to one her eye contact is ok enough not to be an noticeable until you observe her and realise it's not the 'normal' also she talks to you but you can't have a conversation with her that flows between the two of you, she'll kind of blurb out and speak at you not to you.
But she's very good at masking, don't be surprised when you do get a diagnosis that people are helpful and tell you she can't have autism as she makes eye contact/ has friends / talks

Hi OP, exactly the same thing has happened with my DD and it all came to a head when she was 8.

School initially were really unsupportive as they saw no evidence of any autistic behaviours at school despite her problems making friends , whereas outside school her anxiety, sensory issues and the transition from holiday back to school and led to huge meltdowns and such distress. In school she is extremely focused and relatively academic and very very quiet and they were really reluctant to refer her for an assessment

I have gone round in circles for a year, seeing OT for her sensory issues but not really making any progress, but now we have a new SENCO and SALT, who both agree that she absolutely needs to be assessed and have been really supportive and helpful. They have started the referral but it takes 2 years, so it is going to be right when she is transitioning to high school which I know is going to be very very hard for her. It's so difficult to know what the process is and how best to move it forward.

The new SENCO has been great though she went and spoke to all DDs teachers and really prompted them about things I have observed (laser focus in something she is interested in to the point where she doesn't hear you talking to her until you wave your hands in front of her face, very very routine driven, has to have things in a very specific way (PE kit, pencil case, books on desks etc...)) and once prompted they immediately have agreed and also shared more things they have noticed.

She is also very obsessive about her toys and collections - ie LOL dolls she knows all the dolls, who their little sister is and what the pet is, but she never plays with them, she likes to collect, arrange and catalogue them.

I would really like to go private for the diagnosis but not sure how to go about it - I just feel like we have wasted a year getting robbed off

We used this company for a diagnosis as we got fed up waiting after a year and bit.
www.clinical-partners.co.uk/for-adults/autism-and-aspergers

@Sickoffamilydrama thanks for the link - I will give them a call

Socially she's ok. She has a needy friend and a few other friends. She's kind, friendly, appears happy.

At home though she struggles with siblings. If they do even the smallest thing She reacts very badly very quickly.

I considered going privately but I just can't afford to and I've heard that some schools etc don't recognise a private diagnosis, only nhs