ADHD + Sensory processing: 1:1 support?

[MummyMilla]

My DS is 5.5. He can exhibit quite extreme sensory seeking behaviour (which can include licking, biting, hitting, pinching, squeezing) but on the whole is OK.

Due to a school exclusion before xmas, we had to quickly get a private assessment as the NHS one was still miles off. We've been told that he has ADHD and he's been trialling 5mg of Medikinet on school days. Which has improved things but I feel DEEPLY unhappy that we're having to do it at all...it really is a last resort to try and keep him at the school.

School are also insisting he has a 1:1 at all times. He's at an independent school and we're now being asked to pay for this support...which will be £1300 per month! He's only currently in 8:20am - 1:30pm. This is on top off full fees!

Money aside, we feel that with the proactive sensory diet being implemented, the level of 1:1 support would be less. I am really worried that he'll (and they'll) become reliant on the 1:1 and we'll be stuck in this cycle. I am obviously getting the EHCP going but I know that it's not guaranteed and is likely to take ages.

In short, we're obviously willing to take the hit money wise (at least in the short term) if this is what's considered the 'norm' for little ones with ADHD & sensory processing issues. I know all of our kids are different but I cannot help but feel that the school have got us over a barrel as there's nowhere else right now that we can really move him.

My DS has ASD & adhd & is in a very small independent school. Last year after my son was having numerous horrendous outbursts & hurting a lot of staff & kids the school said he’d needed a 1-1.

We were very lucky that they said they would share the cost of the 1-1 with us so we aren’t paying their full salary, we are actually paying less then half. Obviously we are still paying the fees but it’s been a massive benefit to my son & he’s made a lot of progress in class although still behind his peers. He now has an ehcp & we are looking at moving him into mainstream as the school long term can’t meet his needs. I also feel it’s too academic for him & the school really are out of their depth when dealing with him.

Are the school understanding of your sons needs? Do you think if you approached them with a mutual plan of sharing the cost of the 1-1 they could maybe take it to the board of trustees? Do you want your son to stay in that school? Do you they have experience of dealing with other kids like him?

If you get an ehcp you may find that the LA will only award the school a small amount of money that won’t cover the cost of a 1-1. That’s the situation we are in, the school have requested more money but they may not get it. You have more option in mainstream with a 1-1 & potentially more support but every child & school are different as I’m currently finding out!

Speaking from experience it sounds like the most effective thing would be for an OT to work directly with the school in implementing a sensory diet and maybe also bring in a behavioural specialist and then the school will probably be happy to lessen 1:1 once they see positive changes. Maybe think about getting a speech and language assessment as there may also be some difficulties there. Our speech therapist has been brilliant at working on my son's 'behaviours' (I hate that word) with his school. Do keep on good terms with the school - this is really important - and try to bring them round to your view point.

@thekidsarefightingagain and @sorcs - thanks for your replies.

The school are out of their depth and have no experience of tactile hyposensitivity, which is his main 'thing'. I now know of other ASD children who they've had to let go, but have not heard of any ADHD kids either way. I go on about why they accepted him and his brother when we were VERY open with them about his needs (we had an OT report before he started), but that's for another thread!

Yes, to a degree they are on board. I think that they accept their role in persuading us to take both our kids out of a very good state school where they were happy (which is now full!) to send them there, so they do need to do what they can to make it work for DS2. DS1 is thriving I ought to add.

Longer term, I have been in touch with Calder House School as they sound as though they could be good for DS2. I cannot see it working long term with the current school unless DS2's behaviour changes significantly. But am mindful that I don't really want to move him to another school in case it doesn't work, and many of the more specialist schools don't start until 7 or 8. We are also on the waiting list to go back to his primary school I might add, but we're currently 2nd. They have said they may consider him repeating a year, which would put us at first on the list, but again, unsure if this is the right thing to do.

@thekidsarefightingagain I have gone back to NHS OT (she has tried to discharge us!) to ask if she'll go in to new school to assess him again. Annoying thing is that although we haven't moved house, school is in another LA. So I'll see what she says. Otherwise we have a private OT lined up...just feels like we are haemorrhaging cash. Which we are OK to do for a bit, but I cannot work ATM so want to be careful where possible!

Sorry to say my DS is similar (ADHD, just turned 7, some sensory needs), and he has 1:1 in mainstream.