Private school in Surrey for girl with mild ADHD and dyspraxia

[Fishoutofwater80]

Just moved this to the SEN Education board in hopes of a response.

We are moving back from the US after 5 years away and I am overwhelmed just thinking about it all. My biggest concern is our two girls age 9 and 6. The 6 year old has ADHD and dyspraxia both diagnosed by a neuropsych in the US. We’ve fought for services at her current school but keep being told that she’s doing well and they can manage her. At the moment she is in kindergarten where demands are low (as they are in the US for this age) and focused on social skills and pre-academics. She is still working on solidifying letter sounds and phonics, as well a basic early numeracy (Singapore Maths). She is not reading yet and grasps numeracy 1-10, which again, is normal in the US for her age.
She will be going straight to Year 2 in September (older daughter to year 4) and we really want a warm nurturing private school that will manage/challenge both girls but will also understand ADHD and realise it’s a neurologically based disorder, not just “bad behavior”. Both have solid IQ’s and great strengths in some areas but also seem to be late bloomers with reading, spelling etc. We want to give them a chance to flourish academically, but everything I read scares me about how pushy all the private schools are at such a young age and how much homework/pressure etc. there is. We want happy, secure children, who equally get a good education tailored to their strengths. We don’t really feel that state school is an option, as they would both be lost in a class of 30 children and we’d likely find it difficult to get places at a good state school at this stage of the game (we would only want one with an “outstanding” rating if I am being honest blush)

We currently have places in a SW London private school that would suit them both. And is an area we know and like. But having been away we wonder if it’s the time to move further out, away from pollution and the city and the dreaded 11+ (which I’m already having nightmares about as neither one seems to test well at the moment). I also don’t relish the idea of a 11/12 year old taking the London bus or tube to secondary school on their own.

Surrey is really the only place we’d want (or maybe Berkshire) as we have family Surrey direction but nowhere else. Lots of friends (ours, not the kids) still in SW London as well. DH needs to be able to commute to London for work.

We are flexible in terms of housing cost. The right school plus a reasonable commute are our priority.

Any help appreciated. Especially from SEN mums with knowledge of both the US and UK systems.

You may find that British schools are a bit reserved about your dd's ADHD diagnosis. There are some cultural differences between the approach to and diagnosis of ADHD in the US and the UK. In this country it is extremely unlikely that a 6 year old would get a diagnosis of 'mild' ADHD (in fact, it is highly unusual for any child below age 7 to be diagnosed with it). I'm not saying there aren't any issues, just that you need to be aware.

Thanks for responding sexnotjenga.

I should clarify that the school says mild ADHD is what they see but at home we find it more severe and we genuinely think there is probably another diagnosis that may come in the future (we think she’s possibly high functioning ASD or the “old Aspergers” but the psych feels she not socially restricted enough...but girls with ASD is a whole other thread...)

It’s unusual to get an ADHD diagnosis where we are here below age 6/7 too. But two different psych evals came back as this, so she definitely meets the criteria right now. And she was excluded from 2 different pre-schools as a toddler because they couldn’t manage her behavior at the time.

I guess I’m really just interested in a private school that could be a good fit if it turns out that as the demands of school increase she falls apart (which is often what happens to kids like her here in first grade). I probably shouldn’t have emphasized “mild” ADHD and just said ADHD or high functioning ASD.

Thanks for your response though.

Hi there,

My son is Dyspraxic with a Auditory Processing Disorder and SPD. Paediatrician won't assess for ADHD because she says lack of attention is secondary to DCD. This summer, I had a GP tell me that he didn't look like he had ADHD!

Anyhow, he's taking the entry exam for 7+ at the end of the month. We live in the South West, with a limited choice of private schools. The one we're going for a selective/academic, so he's not the best candidate for them. But we'll see.

Here's a link to private schools sympathetic to SEN kids: www.dyslexia-reading-well.com/schools-for-dyslexia-united-kingdom.html

You might have seen this already but just in case...

and maybe this one: www.best-sen-schools.co.uk/page.asp?t=Home

Thanks for the links artichaut27. Good luck with the exam and I hope it works out for you and your son.

Hi OP, have a look at St Hilary's in Godalming. It's very inclusive and nurturing.
www.sthilarysschool.com

This is so helpful and exactly what I’m looking for betterwithasetter1. Having now searched threads about St. Hilary’s it’s given me more ideas on options. Thank you!

I’d also recommend St Hilary’s. They are very nurturing, inclusive and non selective, so very adept at catering for both a range of needs and abilities.