ASD diagnosis today

[CleanHonestGoals]

Hi all

Not really sure why I am writing this, not really sure how to feel.

DS12, finally after years and years of his primary school messing up forms, not being interested, dragging things out got his ASD diagnosis today.

He's been on the pathway for a year or so and but he was in nursery when his child minder confirmed my concerns and expressed a concern too.
DS is such a good kid, high functioning, extremely intelligent but just hasn't a clue socially which has made his life so hard. He has no friends, never has really yet tries so hard to be a happy child. He has other issues as well which the team picked up on, no doubt at all of his diagnosis.

He wasn't with me today when we went to the hospital. I admit I cried, more through relief that they got my boy and understood him.

I'm home and not sure how I feel now. I'm not sure what to say to him when he gets back from his GP. He knows we had the meeting today so it will no doubt be his first question when he walks in.

I want to try and keep it light..is that the best thing to do? I've been googling amazing people with autism and He will be amazed to know Steve Jobs and Bill Gates had/have it as he's is tech mad. Is this the right route?

Sorry, I'm just a bit overwhelmed (even though we've known for years if you see what I mean)

My 14 year old is currently being assessed for autism. At his initial appointment his consultant actually told me to talk to him about famous and successful people with autism. She hadn't even met him at this point as he was outside in the waiting room whilst I gave her his history.

We don't have a diagnosis yet so I've talked to him briefly about it but to be honest he doesn't really want to engage in conversation surrounding anything to do with autism at the moment.

I guess I would keep it light too. Talk when he wants to and not push it if he doesn't.

oh heck. we are going for our first appointment tomorrow, and I have not really thought about what to say if we do or do not get a diagnosis.

this is very helpful, thanks.

There are some great autistic YouTubers as well. Maybe look at some of them yourself and see whether you think they would be helpful? Obviously some of them may have videos that are quite raw on e.g. experiences of bullying, so you'd need to decide whether you think on balance it's helpful - but he might like to see these guys out there and talking about what their autism means to them. People like Connor Ward, Savan Films, Indie Andy and The Aspie World might be good places to start.

I would keep it light too. It's about understanding himself better so he can find ways to achieve whatever he wants to achieve. In time having access to autistic culture and community should help with that too. Hope it goes well!

DS's was a year ago. I remember that feeling of reeling very well... I think we are still reeling in some ways. It's a funny place to be.

If it helps, DS told me this morning that he and his friend (who is also on the spectrum) both think that it is epic to be autistic. His friend's favourite thing is enjoying maths so much, and DS's favourite thing is "seeing the world differently, and that's really cool".

I think yes just keep it light, and in line with whatever else you've told him. Give him a very small bit of info, let him digest and only give him more if he asks. Our line has always been that everyone has things they find hard and things they find difficult, and when an individual's hard and easy things follow a certain pattern then it's called autism. Knowing he's autistic helps us know how to help him.

In terms of books, I've found stuff labelled "Aspie" a better fit than general autism resources. My son's particular favourite is a cartoon in Dude I'm An Aspie (kids version) where it says "I'm not weird, I'm wired differently." He is uber-sensitive about being called weird, and randomly this has really helped his self image.

Many thanks for the kind words.

I'll have a look at that cartoon for him.

It is very strange, as we've spent so long getting this far and now it's arrived it's totally overwhelming.
That was the main thing for DS, that he just get the support he needs and to be able to help him understand himself a bit better.
Thanks

Even though you expect it, ther dx bowls you over like a steamroller, doesn't it? We've all been there

Whatever you do recommend he watches or looks at, vet it first to make sure he'll be okay with it.

As for what to tell him, one description some kids like is that if people were computers, the NT population would run on windows, but the autistic community would use the Mac system - you know, look good, more expensive, more exclusive - use whatever terminology he likes.

Also really start stressing that being autistic is being different, but different does not mean wrong. NT is not right and autism wrong, do try and get that point across as strongly as you can. Different is a good thing, especially when it comes to solving problems, different means innovative, different means a new way of looking at things, etc.

Has he seen this?
the-art-of-autism.com/understanding-the-spectrum-a-comic-strip-explanation/

Thank you so much

I will definitely have a look at that link and show him.
I like your analogy and I'm sure he will too as he is tech mad.