DS4 choked really badly again today but this time I remained calm....

[MegaLegs]

...ish. He had a bad incident a few months ago when I thought he'd died, chocked on paper, ambulance came, xrayed but he was fine. I was a mess, totally lost it and made it worse by sticking my fingers down his throat.

Today I did something so f**ing stupid. I gave him some grapes, I chopped them up but they were big ones and the skins were quite tough. I was sitting opposite him when I realised he was quietly gagging, looking at me. He choughed up one piece but continued to gag. i picked him up, he was crying but weird and wheezy. Tipped him forward but nothing. He kept half crying, gagging and wheezing. Tipped him again, sharp slap, still nothing. Starting to lose it I ran out front door, he did a huge retch and a piece of grape flew across the drive. I have never been so relieved in my life. He was fine but I hugged him all evening. When DH got home I was shaking like mad and threw up in the garden (sorry) am now having glass of wine (large)

My HV is meant to be sending me info on baby resucitation course - will call tomorrow and hassle her.

So sorry you've had such a scare. It all turned out okay though. It is so terrifying when something like that happens. Hope you manage to relax a bit. You are probably in shock. DS1 has never choked but we thought he was dying when he had a fit and in some ways you never completely get over it.

It's the second time he's done it now and I know I shall relive it for the next few nights as I try to sleep. I'm also so jumpy and it will take me ages to relax again. You are so right Pages.

I'm so sorry you've had such a scare. the baby first aid course I did showed us a really effective way of dealing with choking but I wouldn't want to go into it here in case I explain it badly. Hassle that hv, they are so darn forgetful and don't realise how important these things are. I hope you manage to get some sleep, I can understand how shocked you feel tonight.

Feeling better - have numbed myself with a bit of red wine. Also comforting myself with the thought that I did help him this time, i didn't panic until it wa sall over and I helped him get the darn grape out.

Oh dear.
How frightening.
Does he have probs. generally in this department?

He has low muscle tone, which affects his jaw, tongue and swallowing reflex, he is improving but he's always been a gagger . He can cope with normal food now, cut up small but he is a stuffer and he loves grapes.

Have you had salt input? (I am a salt) A lot work in this field exclusively (dysphagia)

Exactly! You DID deal with it ok (both times) so try and focus on the outcome and not the "what might have happened" - it didn't! I also had a near miss accident with DS2 when he was small and I still get shaky when I go back to the place it happened. I was told the anxety and reliving it is post traumatic stress, but I find it is less acute after a period of time when things have been "normal".

My Ds1 used to have similar problems when he was small but as the rest of his muscle tone has improved so has that area. How old is your DS?

DS is just two.

moondog - yes, he ha sbeen seen by the SALT a few times now, she helped us get him onto solids. (He has regular assessments at the CDC) He is pretty good when it comes toeating but he has the occasional gag and the two choking episodes.

sympathies Megalegs - its terrifying. Dd is 2 and does this also.

You're not stupid though to be trying him on lumpier / more difficult foods though. What's the alternative? Feeding him on mush forever? I think my dh would be far happier blending all my dd's meals whereas I keep trying her with things to encourage her chewing and swallowing skills. It is a difficult balance. To some extent, gagging and choking episodes are part of learning to eat but obv they are dangerous and best avoided.

I try and encourage my dd to finger feed. She is just getting the hang of it but has a tendency to stuff all the food in her mouth at once. She choked on toast at a baby group a few weeks ago. I was fairly calm about it - just leaning her forward whilst the other moms were frantic. She was fine. My dh was mortified and doesn't want her to feed herself or eat toast again in the near future. However, the only time she was in serious danger with choking and lost consciousness was when she was sat upright and choked on vomit about 10 mins after a bottle. How could that have been avoided? (see still had similar episodes when NG tube fed as well)

Sorry to have gone on a bit

sympathies Megalegs - its terrifying. Dd is 2 and does this also.

You're not stupid though to be trying him on lumpier / more difficult foods though. What's the alternative? Feeding him on mush forever? I think my dh would be far happier blending all my dd's meals whereas I keep trying her with things to encourage her chewing and swallowing skills. It is a difficult balance. To some extent, gagging and choking episodes are part of learning to eat but obv they are dangerous and best avoided.

I try and encourage my dd to finger feed. She is just getting the hang of it but has a tendency to stuff all the food in her mouth at once. She choked on toast at a baby group a few weeks ago. I was fairly calm about it - just leaning her forward whilst the other moms were frantic. She was fine. My dh was mortified and doesn't want her to feed herself or eat toast again in the near future. However, the only time she was in serious danger with choking and lost consciousness was when she was sat upright and choked on vomit about 10 mins after a bottle. How could that have been avoided? (see still had similar episodes when NG tube fed as well)

Sorry to have gone on a bit

And to have posted that twice