2 yr not acknowledging me will she ever?

[chicken2015]

My 23 month old is showing signs of Austim, which i have posted about on another thread. She has very little eye contact, in own little world 90% of time sometimes babbling to herself, doesnt answer to her name and will not acknowledge us when we speak to her , will about 10% of time. Mainly if we sing or play 'rough play' (tickling, climbing over us etc)
I know i dont have Crystal ball and can not focus too much on future, which i wont know untill she grows up .But i was wondering with the parents of older children, if this happened to your children at same age, did they become better at acknowledging when someone was talking to them? and did they understand when you, talk to them?, was it something naturally happened? or did you have to do specific things to encourage it or is this just how it will be?

Sorry lots of questions just feeling very overwhelmed by it all and would love some reassurance that this is just how life is now
😕

Like you say, there's no crystal ball but I remember the worry very well. My eldest has ASD and is now 13. At your DD's age, he was very similar - rarely responded to his name, little interest in interaction. The first time he was assessed by the SALT at just 2, he pretty much blanked her apart from some looks at her attempts to interact with him. When she visited about 8 months later he was so engaged he tried to stop her leaving!

He didn't call me mum/mummy until he was well over 3, though had long since mastered everyone else's name! He's 13 now, and you'd never know he'd had a speech delay, though his ASD diagnosis would be no surprise.

You're probably already doing this stuff we did. Keep language short, use visual prompts, engaging with things he was interested in and trying to expand communication that way.

Thank u so much for ur reply, i told my husband id wrote this and he said if the answer is they will stay like it i dont want to know , which panicked me that i shouldn't made post! She does interact kinda in her way very subtlety but anytime i give instruction or tell her something it doesnt seem to go in , which is what is upsetting me. I also cant stop crying lately about it , just upset about how it is. Thank u ur post has given me some hope which i desperately needed.

Should say any interaction is non verbal really odd word in context

I think more than anything, I learnt there is a whole lot more to communication than just the ability to say words. It's important to always use words when communicating, but finding other ways to support will not hinder development, quite the opposite I think. So things like visual timetables, picture cards, apps, can make a huge difference.

The toddler years were really hard. It can be so isolating and worrying, but hang in there. She's your lovely DD and so much more than where she comes out on a development chart. x

My son was the same, he’s nearly 9 but acts like a 3 year old, is still in nappies but communication finally seems to be there. So in my experience she’ll get there, it might just take longer. Also Makaton and pecs helped a lot.

Agree with the previous posters. You do learn that there is a lot more to communication than just words. As above visuals, makaton, gestures are all help communication.

My ds was very much in his own world at 2, he's 5 now and there is no comparison. His language although not at the same level of his peers has come on massively and he will even engage with new people if he feels they are interesting enough.

Have you looked into sensory processing issues? The out of synch child is a good book to start with. My ds was so overwhelmed by Sensory issues he found it almost impossible to communicate at all.

Another thing that helped us was intensive interaction. You basically copy everything your child does to help them to engage with you.

I have the book more than words, i know a little as primary school teacher , so have experience of children with autism , thats why i have see it in my child. I have started to read more than words and it seems my little girl is more under sensitive than over. Im def feeling the lonely and would love to meet parents who r going through same. Ive reached out to children centre hoping they will point me in direction of finding some

More than words is a great resource. You're streets ahead of where I was with DS1 at your DD's age. I hope the children's centre can direct you to some additional support. It's a marathon not a sprint - a cliché but true nonetheless.

Im really finding book very helpful, its just so overwhelming having my own child having difficultes than teaching children for 6 hours a day, also im very much in grief stage i think cant stop crying about the whole thing, my worry is because i have experience and picked it up early there might not be as many parents in same situation as me, i mean i dont know im just guessing

I really feel for you, it takes me right back to that time. I can't promise how it will work out for you, but 10 years down the line and another DC with ASD (I have 4) and we chug along nicely. I won't claim it's all hearts and flowers but it's so much better than when we were at the beginning of the realisation DS1 had difficulties.

The children may be older than your DD, but there will be other parents and carers going through the same thing. Finding them can be difficult, might be worth checking FB to see if there are any parent groups for children with SN. When DS1 was a toddler, I made friends with a nanny who was caring for DTs with additional needs. Not the same difficulties as DS1, but it worked well.

Thank you for the replies it does mean a lot, im actually 7 months pregant with 2nd so naturally worrying a little about possibility of 2nd having issues as well, as know it can run in families, also getting fed up of people just saying im hormonal due to being pregnant is why im so upset about it all (this is my parents, they r very much in denial) hosting christmas tomorrow with said parents so hoping it goes ok! They can be very over the top my DD and she isnt interested, so difficult
Thank u for mentioning fb i will look now

DS2 had just been born when I started the referral process for DS1 (21 months between them). They've always been close. It's my DS3 who has ASD as well. Oh yes, family denial happened here too! Smile and nod, smile and nod.

Good luck and hang in there.

I have two dds with autism. My middle and youngest dds have autism. Middle dd seemed very autistic but we didn’t realise at the time (denial and lack of knowledge) by the time we really knew we’d had dd 3. Middle dd is 8 now. Great speech, very engaging although strong willed. Youngest dd is very engaged with me but much more anxious and has a severe expressive language disorder. Like all children they develop and grow. My dds aren’t the same now as what they were at 2.

Thank u again for everyone who has replied i am beginning to feel less alone, DD is obsessed with hey duggee and is getting a few hey duggee merchandise duggee toy, pjs book etc, which she hasnt had before so very excited she will like them. So that is helping me look forward to tomorrow, have lovely christmas everyone

I hope you’ve had a good Christmas Day chicken

I just wanted to say that my DD, who has autism, is so completely different at 7 to how she was at 2.

I’m also a SALT and specialist in working with children with autism. An approach called Intensive Interaction can be really beneficial in helping develop early interaction and communication skills.

Hello yes we had a good christmas , she wasnt too interested in the present but coped quite well being around a lot of people, thank u for recommending the approach i will look into it.

Hope you are ok. Children with ASD each seem to develop in different ways so you can't predict the future now. I would have thought the fact there is some interaction is a good thing?

I found the book Engaging Autism by Stanley Greenspan helpful. It had strategies for engaging children with different types of sensory needs/behaviours so as to enter their world and build connections (the idea being you then build on those embryonic social connections by repetition and extending the interaction).

Also have you looked up whether your area has a Portage service? I'm not sure if it works the same way everywhere but in our county you could be referred by various professionals (although there was a long waiting list). It was incredibly helpful, someone came to the house and showed me strategies to engage and interact through play, lots of turn taking games.

At age 2 my DS wouldn't respond to his name and was very focussed on his own activities, though he was aware of us and would interact when it suited him. He underwent a huge social development around his 4th birthday and he now is very playful and makes lots of eye contact and positively seeks out interaction. He still doesn't talk (he's still 4) but that's another story. He communicates meaningfully in lots of other ways.

Just wanted to say that my dd who is now 3 was so similar at 20 months. As I have a ds with asd I too her to hv to get the ball rolling early. She had no communication at all then and seemed to have no understanding.
Hv did an early review and agreed she scored very strongly for autism so referred to paediatrician, speech therapist and also portage.
Portage started about two month later and the service was fantastic. She taught me how to communicate and how to encourage play skills.
My dd wouldn't interact with me in the same way as she did the portage lady so it was amazing to see that she had the communication skills inside her, just needed to find ways to help.
She had portage for about 14 months in total. She is now 3 and a half.
She can communicate now, she has a fantastic personality but is also pretty challenging still.
She is on the asd pathway and due to be diagnosed anytime.
Definitely recommend portage if you can get a hv referral- I think you can also self refer to the service.

My son is 12 and he is still in pads he doesn't say anything he's nonverbal

Hello just checking back as had some more replies, she is having her 2 year check next week, so hoping to start ball rolling for some support, been feeling very emotional about it recently but then also pregant and having baby in 3 weeks! So all change for us!

Hey sorry I know it’s a very old thread but how is your little one doing now my son is very similar