DS 12 - could this be high functioning autism?

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DS has just turned 12 and is in Year 7. So far GP has been dismissive of our concerns, but we haven't been back in the last 3 years as GP promised he would grow out of it and we were made to feel embarrassed and precious ! I was wondering if you knowledgable people could tell me if you would have him assessed via school for ASD (if you were in our shoes).

*Extreme selective eater since birth, will only eat fish fingers, bread, microwave fries, peanut butter, pasta with butter, original flavour hula hoops, some sweets and desserts but nothing with 'bits' 'nuts' 'lumps' etc. These things make up his entire diet, there is nothing else. Never eaten meat owing to his animal welfare views but probably texture too. He will endure a few slices of apple to please me (or shut me up).

*Very capable student, top results in his year 6 SATS, and year 7 tests. New school have said he has a reading age of 16+ and as target grades are coming through for GCSE it's all 8s and 9s.

*Despite academic aptitude has awful handwriting, holds a pen very awkwardly.

*Cannot ride a bike at 12, couldn't even really ride one with stabilisers and has huge anxiety and refusal to go near bikes.

*Still very slow and awkward with fine motor skills such as tying laces and using cutlery. Prefers Velcro shoes as to not stand out.

*Anxiety in social situations with crowds, nearly always refuses parties and discos. Has friends but prefers small groups coming round to our house. Dislikes school trips, did not go on Year 6 residential because of anxiety and food issues.
As a younger child he was late with potty training as had phobia of unknown toilets. Also cried continuously at nursery and first 6 months of reception. Had a dummy until he was about 6.

*Social skills seem good, no problem with eye contact but keeps himself to himself at home, prefers to be in his room

*Adores computers and consoles (normal for age? ) and continuously goes on about computery things that the rest of the household does not understand!

*excellent memory and general knowledge/trivia.. used to win the trivia quiz in year 6 most weeks!

I would love to hear your thoughts! Thanks in advance

Have you looked into dyspraxia? The problems with motor skills point to this. Keeping himself to himself at home sounds very typical teenage boy as does the interest in computers.

Yes, I thought it could be dyspraxia. My DS2 is DX (diagnosed) with ASD but there’s a lot of crossover. The fine and gross motor skills are classic dyspraxia symptoms and a lot of the social anxiety and obsession stuff could be too. Food sensitivity is also common in both DXes.

DS2 hasn’t ever been DXed with dyspraxia because the ASD DX seems to encompass pretty much all the dyspraxic symptoms.

I’d push for an assessment via GP if your DS is struggling. School can assess via an educational psychologist for extra help, but not DX ASD or dyspraxia. And the waiting list will be long. There’s not enough money in schools to pay for enough EP time unless very serious issues, sadly.

An occupational therapist can DX dyspraxia though. Your DS might benefit from seeing a specialist OT who could give exercises to improve sensory issues as well as motor skills. There might be private OTs if that’s within your budget.

You could have been describing my DS!

Asperger's, and dyspraxia.

Thanks all. Seems like I might approach to ask about dyspraxia. Really helpful info, thank you so much

You mentioned he needs to wear velcro shoes. These elastic shoelaces are very handy. www.amazon.co.uk/gp/aw/d/B00G9Y186G/ref=cts_sh_1_vtp?dpPl=1&dpID=51mEtsiW5xL&pi=SL110&tag=mumsnetforum-21&ie=UTF8

They go onto any shoe or trainer and never need to be tied, they can’t open. You can slip your foot into and out of your shoe when you want to but the shoe is not loose when you are walking around. My son uses them as he can’t tie his laces. It just means you have more options rather than being limited to velcro shoes.

It sounds more like dyspraxia. I recommend asking if they can refer you to a OT for assessment. It’s worth getting pushy with them and politely request a professional assessment. The school can help to some extent but remember the waiting list is not short.
The occupational therapist should suggest some exercises that target sensory problems and motor skills. I’ve often had to email specialists specifically asking for a appointment or a referral too.
Good luck!!