GCSEs, Dyslexia and a Tale of Hope

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All
I thought long and hard about writing this post but decided that when I first found out my DD was dyslexic I would have loved to hear this.

DD was lucky enough to have her dyslexia diagnosed very early but was still struggling to read at 9. She was terribly demotivated and decided she was dumb. Then she began to use a laptop, found ways of learning that suited her, spent a couple of hours a week with a SEN teacher and worked her socks off. Little by little she got better, her motivation increased which then made her believe she could pass some exams and this motivation spurred her on to try harder and harder - a virtuous circle.

At aged 9 there was concern about whether she would achieve much/anything in the way of GCSEs. At aged 11 she had an award for 'most improved', she had fought her way up from bottom to top sets in everything except English,

Thursday she got her GCSE results - 5 x A/7 and 5 x 8/A** (weirdly this included an 8 in English where she would have lost ALL of the spag points)

I am not writing this post to brag. I am writing this to give hope. Hope that I didn't have 7 years ago. Just because a child has SEN doesn't mean they can't achieve great things - with spirit, fight, determination and the right support it is possible for them to achieve their full potential. That potential could be anything from a 3 in English, to an A* in maths, to a football coach, an inventor or great artists or simply a nice happy individual

All it takes is belief, hard work (and for dyslexic DC harder than most others) and the ability to pick yourself up, brush yourself down and think of an alternative way to get what you want.

As an aside one of DDs friends is autistic, she joined the school in Y8 due to bullying. She has friends that try (and in the most part do) understand her. She has also produced some amazing GCSE results which are all 5 and above.

That's great to hear! Well done to your daughter! and to you

Thanks @Laura0806 - that truly wasn't what it was about though.

To my shame, in my mind I wrote her off academically. I just don't want anyone else to do that or to limit their, or their children's expectations

I wished someone else had told me their stories of their children succeeding and that someone had told my daughter that it was possible. It would have helped her self confidence sooooo much.

To start with she couldn't be bothered because she thought she would fail. She acted the clown because it was less shameful than to say she didn't understand or she couldn't do it. Basically she had given up.

From my perspective it was really scary being told that she was extremely dyslexic and that she would always have problems reading and writing. My interpretation was that all was lost and that her life would be limited. Her interpretation was that she was thick and would always be behind he peers so why bother.

We were both very wrong.

I am not suggesting that all DC with SEN can get As, in the same way as I don't think everyone without SEN will get As.

However I am suggesting that our DC can achieve their FULL potential (whatever that may be) with the right help and that I made a prejudgment that was wrong.

I fear that schools often do the same which then lowers parents expectations which in turn lowers DCs expectations.

I remember vividly that when she was about to go into YR10 and saying to a teacher that's he shouldn't give DD any slack and to not let her use the dyslexia card. In the real world she would have to meet deadlines, sit still, not drop pens on the floor and to produce something the same as everyone else (albeit typed which is the real world!!). He was taken aback....
He was harsh and had exactly the same expectations of her as everyone else. He helped her, encouraged her, gave her detentions if she didn't do her homework......he was her favourite teacher

The school was brilliant. If she got too fidgety she was allowed to sit on the floor at the front of the class - in this particular subject it often ended up with everyone on the floor (including the teacher) discussing topics

Hi, totally understand. I'm on your journey but nearer the start and I have also been told that my child will never meet expectations. I am dealing with a child who avoids putting pen to paper because of fear and has no confidence. I believe that he can meet expectations and won't give up because the SENCO said. I just wanted to say well done to you because I know it can't have been an easy journey.

I’m glad you posted - it would be lovely to see the outcome for my DS aged 9 who is severely dyslexic. I know he has enormous potential as, if he didn’t need to read or write, nobody would know he has any problems.

But we struggle on as there is a real world beyond school and I just want to make sure he finds a place in it that makes him happy.

It’s very hard to see beyond the difficulties now so your post helps.

@Laura0806
@Raederle

I have taken the liberty of PMing you both re things that worked for DD

Please feel free to trash the message but it may/may not be helpful 😀