I think you need to sit down and work out what's best for your son for his secondary education.
IF you relocate back "home" you will be constantly dealing with all the people who have been so obstructive to you all his school life. They are not going to change their ways.
You've taken him out of that system, you've moved, you've obtained a valid clinical diagnosis for him.
What you want to do is to go home, wave his diagnosis at them and demand the education he should have with all the necessary interventions mentioned in his report - and after all the hassle you've had, I don't blame you. Stick them all with a big fat Up Yours and make them do what they should have been doing in the first place because you're right and they were very wrong. I'd want to do that too, I feel righteous anger on your behalf.
However, the GP in that area has already as good as told you that his diagnosis may not be accepted by whoever "accepts" diagnoses there.
That means at the very least you have to find out who that organisation is - school, their equivalent of LEA or more likely a combination of people who all know each other and socialise together so professional boundaries can become blurred.
Don't forget the fact you've already been accused of "potential future emotional abuse" for questioning that your son is not NT and already had SS to deal with over that. I'd want to know if they could escalate that.
For reasons I cannot fathom, the people who should accept your son's diagnosis are already putting more obstacles in your way and questioning it.
As I see it, you have two choices
- Get legal representation to prove your son's diagnosis is valid and have him taught in a school at "home".
The only flaw with this is do you know if the people who have so far denied he has ASD and caused SS etc. have any influence at the school he would attend? I know it shouldn't happen, but you have enough prior evidence from his schooling there to wonder about continuing.
Unfortunately even with a valid diagnosis and a list of things your child needs help with, some schools are really rubbish at provision.
That's evidenced by post after post on these boards.
- He's 14 now, could you not find a good school in your new area for him that will take his diagnosis at face value and also provide the interventions he needs for learning to GCSE and further Ed, so he could just attend a new school and have none of the "home" people interfering, until he's finished his secondary education?
It's up to you how much more you want to fight for what should be provided for your son. If you go "home" will there be so many more obstacles in your path that you'll spend so long fighting for what he needs, by the time that's resolved he could have left school but had no help whatsoever and not reached his full potential.
Only you know the full situation, all I can advise is that you drop the feeling of being right (you are, we all know that) and focus on what action now will provide the best education for your son.