when do you start accepting it all?????

[anniebear]

From what I have read so far, some of you have older children with Special Needs.

Can I ask, do you think you can ever accept your child's disability and move on in life? (pretty deep I know and it's past my bedtime!)

My Daughter Ellie fell ill at the age of 8 months, until then she was a healthy baby. She will be three in two weeks time.

Obviously I don't cry as much as I used to but still am at the point were I think it is all so unfair, why us? why not the horrible families who don't keep their kid's safe and don't look after them properly?

I wouldn't wish illness on any another child, but it seems really unfair when you see children in cars with no seat belts, young children playing out when it is dark, I could go on... Then there is us and plenty of others who do everything within our capabilities to try to keep our child as safe as possible and she gets a serious illness that leaves her with brain damage.

Do these, sometimes bitter, feelings disappear? I thought I would be accepting it all by now but I am not.

I feel like I have been robbed of my little girl and often think what she would have been like.

I am sorry to do a depressing e mail. I am sure many of you feel as I do.

Many people ask me how I cope. I just shrug and say "you just do" What else can you do?

Dear Anniebear
Just come across your message. My situation similar as in DS1 had a fever at 9 months and came out the child he is now at 17 years old. A friend of mine told me when he was 4 that she always thought she had accepted it and then something else would happen that would bring it all home. The grief doesn't go away but the acceptance does come. I see your message has been posted for a while so I'll check again to see if you want to continue with the string!

BJmum here is the rest of the thread:-

here

HTH

I agree many people ask me how I cope with Dh disabled, ds AS child and dd ADHD. You just do it. I've been married for 10 years+ ds is 9 and dd is 7, it becomes a part of life and you just get on with it.

These feelings do disappear, but sometimes raise thier ugly head when you are tired or under stress.

Hang on in there it does get better {{{{{}}}}} big hug