Hi, I'm currently waiting for the school to get in a child psychologist and start assesing my 7 year old son. He seems to have alot of issues with sulking or crying if told off, embarrassed, if he gets his work wrong, or wants something. He has always seemed a bit uncomfortable around people unless they are close family members. He has stuck to mainly being friends at school, with those that he went to pre school with. He isn't usually confident to initiate the social interaction but will respond well when his friends come up to him, and he is well liked as he is kind, doesn't like confrontation and generally is nice to be around. The first 2 years at school he got by, would go into class fine, go into the dinner hall, assembly, go out at break etc. He would come accross as slightly nervous or shy but he would cope. Then year 2, he has changed massively. He got a very shouty teacher who is very up and down in moods, quite in your face jokey, and I think if my son went a bit shy she would try too hard to get him to come out of himself, and if he didn't want to do a test or something, she would tell him off in front of everyone. So then he started to withdraw, stopped being happy at school, started refusing to go to the hall for lunch as he said it was too noisy, he was told off once for messing around with his friends in pe, and I don't think he has got changed for pe once, sometimes he does it in his clothes but he says the pe teacher shouts, he says most of his problems are because he doesn't like the teachers shouting. They started giving him help, like cards to use instead of putting his hand up for help, took him out of tests, but then they took away the help cards and the swivel chair he sat on, so he could get ready for the next school year, and it has all escalated. On 3 occasions he has done something physical like throwing books, flipping over chairs so he could hide under a table so nobody could follow him, I never ever would have thought he would ever behave like this a year ago!
I'm trying to see if I can make a link between some things he does and if there is a diagnosis, or if it is just a very bad reaction to a misuited teacher. But surely if all the other kids can just about get by (alot of them have also had a not so good year with this particular teacher) then so would he? He has spend alot of time with another child who has these outbursts so I wondered if he is copying.
Things I have picked up on that I'm not sure if it's normal are: if I am cooking etc. He will repeat his sentence instantly 2 or 3 times till I answer.
He is very insistent, wants to know exact details, exactly how long till we are going, exactly what time will we play a game etc.
Half the time he can handle me saying no to him, but if its something really important to him then he can well up or cry instantly. At school, he was crying at the top of his voice in year 2, for 15 minutes at a time.. He never did this before year 2. He did it once just because his teacher said no to him about picking up his trade cards that he couldn't get too.
He is very bright though, picks things up easily but dislikes writing and gets upset about his work being marked as he says he doesn't want it all crossed out if he gets bits wrong.
If another child accuses him of doing something wrong, he will go off and cry or sulk for a long time.
He can handle most sensory things like suncream, sock seams etc. But he will only eat thin chips, he dislikes all other potato. He has gone off banans too as he says he hates the after taste. He does like to have clean hands, hates stickyness.
He is quite good at reading between the lines, so wasn't sure he would meet aspergers criteria (although his dad seems to have alot of features of this)
His talking was slightly delayed by about 6 months but he had a dummy, and chats away non stop to familiar adults now!
He loves football and is very well Co ordinated, had excellent balance skills and isn't clumsy at all, very good at most sports.
It's mainly this bizarre year 2 he has had, I put it down to this teacher as he clams up around her and got to the point where he would t go into class, wouldn't sit on the mat, wouldn't sit on a chair, but I thought maybe he was copying the other child who does it, as he seems to then get to go off and do more fun things... My child is clever and wouldn't surprise me if he sussed that happening and thought he would copy! But then even at tesco a woman commented on how my son had a wobbly trolley like hers, and for 5 minutes after he tried to get me to take the trolley to push it and kept asking me if it was him or the trolley. I told him not to worry as it was the trolley and he was doing a good job and I'd hold one end, but you could see him getting worried about it. I am doing so much with him to help, reward charts, coping techniques, told him to play I spy to prevent him screaming, gave him sensory stretchy toys to use, he had a quiet corner at school he could use etc. I've made him a tin to put a token in, so everytime he overcomes a problem, like choosing not to cry, or to do some writing or have lunch in the hall etc. He can put a token in his tin and then have a dvd night etc. If he gets enough tokens. I'm hoping the new lovely teacher helps next year but if he hurts someone by throwing books etc. The head said she will have to exclude him so I've been really worried. I would try cbt and exposure therapy with him, but most of his anxiety seems to be with adults he doesn't know, being told off, getting things perfectly right. I have explained so many times about how it's OK to not get things right, how everyone gets told off, etc. But it seems to be spiralling out of Control that I'm wondering if they will diagnose him, but with what? His senco teacher said she was on the fence with him, she could see anxiety but couldn't really spot anything else....
Thanks for reading my very long post! And I still don't feel I've covered everything!