Hi,
This is my first post on here... I have twins. They are 5. My girl was diagnosed with GDD at 2. She is doing really well and better than we feared at first. We don't know why she has GDD. All tests came back fine. She is in mainstream school with her (very mature and intelligent) twin bro. I have just learnt today that she is not on the SEN register at school which horrified me! I had met the SENCO and the classroom teacher before she started (with all the docs letters etc) and they said that her needs were not complex enough and there was not enough funding anyway for her to have a one 2 one full time but that she would get extra help in class from the TA. These seemed fine to me and so we went ahead. I explained that my daughter has difficulties making friends and has some compulsive behaviours - she loves to play with hair and this is exhausting for everyone and frustrating for her. We talked about her other issues and strengths and I felt that the school had a good measure of her and would create an IEP. But it turns out that she doesn't have an IEP and they didn't put her on the register cos they felt that I was opposed to labels etc. I only said that I would be looking into ASD diagnosed if traits continue into this year (and I now am). The nursery manager at the adjoined nursery was also at that meeting and had previously landed on me that she might have sensory processing disorder and I was a bit annoyed that she was making such a diagnosis as a non-medical but said ok, if you think so.... So now I feel that they are somewhat blaming me and not doing enough to help!! The SENCO is only in the school 1.5 days a week and has no one2one sessions with her. I queried that a few weeks into the year and they said she doesn't qualify. Her delay was described by paed as moderate and global - in my books that is pretty SN!! She clearly needs some social interaction lessons. This term she has started to not want to go to school. She is moderately happy when I pick her. The teacher has twice now rather unhelpfully told me that 'she just struggles to make friends' and 'she thinks that she has friends but really she is not really connecting with them and always goes back to the topic of hair'. Teacher is about as subtle as a spade. I am wondering what they are doing about it though. We have a meeting lined up with SENCO in May and I hope all will become clearer. I have asked if they think she would be better suited in a special school and they say that it is too hard to say at this stage. She is a loving and charming little girl who is fit and healthy and able to learn, albeit slowly and in a different way. She also has challenging behaviour but is mostly pretty co-operative. I have no idea anymore what is right and would love to meet a family in the somerset/dorset area who is going through, or has gone through, a similar thing. I have found that OT, physio, portage, Paeds, all rather useless and my hubbie and I have gone it alone on the most part. It has been exhausting and lonely but I thought was turning a corner. Now I wonder whether they are coppign out and want to have her placed elsewhere. I am a secondary school teacher and start back at work after a two year break this sept and wonder whether really I should be at home for a bit longer.... but money doesn't grow on trees! Any help, suggestions, advice is most welcomed. Thanks mums and dads xxx